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Stephanie
Just Said Yes January 2021

Legal marriage before wedding

Stephanie, on August 5, 2020 at 11:24 AM Posted in Community Conversations 0 3
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We are recently engaged and our wedding is on January 2, 2021. We are contemplating getting married prior to this. For various reasons, a few being health insurance, modification of visitation/custody of his children (us living together not married is frowned upon and not helping the case and he currently isn’t allowed to have a “girlfriend” in their presence), and of course Covid. My fear is people being upset or just not showing up to the wedding if we are already legally married a few months prior. We don’t want to do just a “reception”. We want the traditional walk down the aisle and say vows ceremony. We already have the venue rented. Unfortunately keeping it a secret won’t be an option. Once his ex wife finds out (and she will due to us trying to modify his custody) she will tell everyone. And I would prefer to announce it myself rather than her. But I’m not sure how to approach telling everyone, explaining why, and hoping they will still come to our ceremony. And just an FYI, everyone coming would be local, we have no one traveling from out of town that would be spending tons of money to attend. And we are not having a bridal party. And we are paying for everything ourselves.

3 Comments

Latest activity by Lynnie, on August 6, 2020 at 3:40 PM
  • Yasmine
    Rockstar October 2020
    Yasmine ·
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    My fiance and I are legally getting married 10/6/20 because that date is significant to us. We started dating 10/6/16, got engaged 10/6/19 and wanted to legally be married that same day but its a Tuesday this year which would be inconvenient. We are having our actual wedding in March and will still be doing a ceremony. Everyone close to us knows about our "elopement" and it didn't change anyones opinion, they are still really looking forward to the wedding in March!

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  • T
    Dedicated April 2021
    Tracy ·
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    My previous landlord was selling the home I was renting, so my daughter and I had to be out by the end of October. Robert proposed to me in June, and we knew I had a short time before I had to find other living arrangements, so we started house hunting almost immediately. We bought our home in September. My daughter and I moved in at the end of October. Robert and I are old-fashioned, and didn't really want to live together without being married, so we eloped on Friday, December 13, 2019. I have to say, I am SO happy to be together with him through all this Covid stuff! We had been planning our big wedding party, which has fallen through twice, due to Covid. Now, we're in the process of getting our money back (Yaay!!! We just heard today our venue is giving us a total refund!), so we can wait and have our wedding when it's safe enough for All our friends and family to celebrate with us.
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  • Lynnie
    WeddingWire Administrator October 2016
    Lynnie ·
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    Hi Stephanie! I would certainly hope that your family and friends will still turn out to celebrate your wedding with you in January! Smiley heart

    My husband and I had 2 friends weddings postponed until 2021, but both couples are getting married in family-only ceremonies this year. That won't change my reception attendance at all!

    The pandemic has made everyone stop and re-prioritize so I think your guests will understand.Smiley heart

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