Last Minute Groomsman!!

I mean, 4 months out is not really "last minute". However, your FH should only ask him if he really wants him to be in it, not because he's being pressured by the friend.

FH should have talked to him if he really wanted him in the WP, he should have let the friend make the decision if he was too busy or not.

I agree to add him now would potentially be bad, but so will him finding out FH didn’t ask him, both can affect the friendship.

Bride2Be makes a good point.

I just mean "last minute" because the other guys have already been asked.

How long ago were they asked?

@hisbeauty that is exactly my fear! I can see it going bad either way!

If he wants to be a groomsman and FH wants him to be a groomsman, he should ask. Don't be pressured but don't not ask just because you feel like it is too late.

They were asked last month!

Let the guys talk it out. FH can be honest and say hey, I knew you were busy with the new job but I still should've asked. If he genuinely wants him in the wedding party, he should just tell him but make it clear he's not obligated to be in it.

@rosered yes, FH shouldn't have assumed anything! I just wasn't sure if it's tacky to ask, after the other guys have been asked.

Then it's definitely not too late to add another. We did the same thing the month after we asked 4 of our now 5. If FH really wants him in, it's totally fine. If he's being pressured by anyone, I'd reconsider though

@eileen thank you! That sounds good! I'm gonna have FH say that lol!

@kourtney oh cool, then I won't feel bad about adding him lol. He wanted him to be a part of it from the get go but he just assumed he would say no because he's been so busy.

That's similar to us and why we chose to wait a bit! FH's groomsman is in the military and we weren't sure if he'd be home on the wedding date. Once we found out he would be, FH asked him!

I feel much better about it now lol! He'll probably ask him next weekend when they go out! Thanks so much

We've kind of been asking people one by one as it's convenient. So it's not that weird in my opinion that there's a time difference

If it makes you feel better,most guys don't get nearly as twitchy about this type of stuff as women.

I agree with Eileen. Unless I missed something finance assumed friend was too busy and hence didn't ask him because of that. I think he still should have asked (assuminghe wanted him the wedding party). he should just talk asap with friend and ask him explaining that he did bad in assumng bf or good friend was too busy. I am not sure if I am being played but a groom once told me that he didn't pick me as a groomsman because he thought I would rather MC (for the 11th time at that point) and that it would be more fun - as a wedding planner I beleive the hardest job is the mc if they are doing it right - keeping things, fun, interesting, on time while staying pc and considerate of feelings. He should have asked me and I could have decided. There is still time to correct this - just get fiance to explain what happened - I am sure these two guys can move on.

When guys joke about these things it means they are wondering why they haven't been asked. I remember a wedding where there was an open mic - dangerous. THREE guys took to the might cracking jokes which obviously were not jokes about them not being asked to be in the wedding party and worse they were sat at the edge of the tent and it was pouring rain on them. (Side note the groom continued to dig his grave sending emails to him and other "runner ups" (to his brothers which was duh obvious but his probable faux pas was asking his boss and co worker who he had been working with for 6 mos and who both left 4 mosl later. Anyways Mr. Groom wrote an email to each "runner up groomsman" saying such things you're too shy, you are too busy with your kids, you are too old, you live far away and I will probably never see you regularly.

It just wasn't good at all.