Last minute declines

Unless there is a big emergency (like travel cancelled due to weather) or health crisis, I think it is so rude that people are declining last minute! You paid for them already! Honestly, I would ignore them too lol. Try to put it out of your head and enjoy your day!!

To me, last minute declines are better than no shows! We had 1 groomsman show up alone (told us his wife & daughter were coming), two people no show entirely (no reach out before or after), a group of 4 adults show up without the two kids they RSVPed for then leave after cocktail hour. I don't think you need to respond to people or if you do just make it really short.

Hi Amina,
Sorry you had cancellations so close to the day, unacceptable unless there was a medical emergency, don't worry about back to back weddings, I've been to several, no problems, find some time for yourself to hide, you deserve down time!! I'm not getting married until Feb. 2021, and I feel stressed already, I'm hating my dress, which I've had for 4 months already, good luck, I hope you have a WONDERFUL day!!!!!

I’m sorry to hear that people are canceling so late. That’s extremely rude after you’ve already paid. I would say to try to take several hours for yourself and ignore your phone if you can. Go to a spa or just relax and do nothing. The next few days only get more busy.

View Quoted Comment Exactly! Lol FH’s sister can’t make it because she doesn’t have clothes... Her sons are the ring beaters and we bought their outfits so they’re going. But somehow even after knowing about the date for over a year she doesn’t have an outfit 3 days before. His grandfather is also upset and coming because no one offered to leave the reception early to drive him home. Please note that we offered him an Uber or to get his good friend to come to get him and nothing worked so looks like we’ll be partying without them lol

Amina, shake it off, girl!! You don't want to feel down right before your wedding. Unless it was an emergency, it's so rude so close to the wedding to be saying you're not coming. So that's terrible. Try and enjoy your special day

Take a deep breath.



Have you already paid for the people who are cancelling? Is it too late to ask your caterer to remove their plates (I’d give it a shot at least!)? Better they let you know at least than just not show up.

If the other wedding ends at noon that’s PLENTY of time before your 5:30pm wedding.

3 days before my wedding (my last day of work before my time off) our coordinator switched our tables around so I had to redo the seating chart. My coordinator then called and said she wouldn’t be attending our rehearsal because she had to take her daughter’s dog to the vet at noon (rehearsal was at 3:30?) My great uncle showed up from across the country (he was planning to stay for a week) with literally nothing but the clothes on his back and a suit for the wedding (so my mom had to go buy him a week’s worth of clothing!) We tried to plan a welcome dinner for our bridal party and while ALL of my husband’s groomsmen were eager to come, NONE of my bridesmaids could (excuses ranged from not being in town yet, to having to work, to having another event to attend, to wanting to spend time with another friend instead......)

The thing is, in 3 days, NONE OF THIS will matter! You’re going to be so happy you’ll forget all about all the stress. Allow yourself to be happy and excited. Let the stress go.

Remember to breathe. And repeat after me: “I calm, I am confident, I am fortunate. I am not responsible for anyone but myself. I choose peace.”

Yes of course! I did exactly this. The day of the wedding, I put my phone aside and just let others handle things for me. Some people called/texted to tell me they couldn't make it, I just ignored it. One of my bridesmaids even didn't show up for hair & makeup and kept calling me stressing me out so badly, finally I just gave my phone to another bridesmaid and said I am not dealing with it. Either she will make it or not. I made the conscious decision to enjoy the day no matter what, and it was amazing! It is YOUR big day, enjoy it, take it all in, and ignore the bad!

I've been dealing with last minute cancellations too.... it's so frustrating and rude, like I get it if there's real emergencies or a health crisis, but c'mon people. I swear most of the last minute cancellations are people who couldn't make it in the first place and felt bad to say no at first. We're 3 days away as well and have had 10 people cancel in the last week!! I keep having to call the caterer to tell them more people cancelled.

View Quoted Comment

Oh goodness people are extra sometimes! Best of luck on your day! I know you've had some bumps along the way but it'll all be worth it!

Heyyyy RELAX!

Places that hold events are used to flipping a room in good timing and some to spare. That is the least of your worries.

People will cancel. It's the inevitable and you can't control it... ignore.

Put your phone away on your wedding day. Give it to your bridesmaid and let her preview messages - only needing a response for what is important. Have champagne, and get married!!

Ugh I had people decline last minute too. It's annoying because at that point that kind of lost money. But I wish you the best for your upcoming day