KWR - Reverse Intervention?

Her boyfriend was rambling on and he was so drunk I could barely understand what he was trying to say. I just smiled and nodded because I honestly was so uncomfortable and didn't know what to do. Then my friend said that it was difficult for her that I quit drinking because she didn't know what she should get me when people are drinking? And that she feels like she can't drink in front of me, which is ridiculous because I told my friends from the get-go that I was 100% okay with being around alcohol. In fact, I meet my friends at the bar once a week - I eat food, drink water, and enjoy the company. Then she told me that she didn't want me to be uncomfortable... all the while my brain is screaming "THIS IS UNCOMFORTABLE!"

Thankfully my friend (another BM) jumped in and pulled me away from the conversation. I'm so baffled right now. It's like she's threatened by me quitting drinking... then she goes on to tell a story about how the best cure for a hangover is to drink more the next day when you wake up. I honestly think SHE has a drinking problem, too, but is in denial about it. But anyways... I can't believe she would do something like that to me. I'm so upset that I wish I could kick her out of my wedding party, but it would cause more drama than it's worth. Ugh...

Good for you for making a hard choice for your health and happiness! I also quit drinking for about six months last year because I had gotten out of control. Your friends' "intervention" says more about them than you. It probably made them reflect on their own choices with drinking and they don't want to face them. When I was in the height of my drinking days I hated sober people because they made me question my own relationship with alcohol and that was no fun. I would maybe distance yourself from the unsupportive friends and avoid one on one time with them when they're drinking.

She might actually have a problem and probably feels insecure that you got the strength to do something about it. Don't let her bring you down

Sounds like she's projecting a lot of her own issues.

I'm sorry your friend did that to you. You have made a decision for yourself and your health, and you should be proud of yourself for making this choice!

It sounds like your friend is being bitter and immature because you're not getting drunk with her. She needs to get over that and be a friend.

Really great job making the decision for yourself and making a change to improve yourself and your life! I agree with all previous posters that she does not want to look at her own behavior and really her behavior has very little to do with you. Ignore it if you can for now and if you do want to talk to her about it, do it while she is sober and it is just the two of you together. Stay strong in your choices.

So proud of you for getting out of that situation. I've been sober for 8 years and when I first quit my friends did a similar reverse intervention. It was so hard, weird and confusing for me. I was still trying to understand my own drinking. As others have said, this is more about them than you. I found a lot of help in a 12 step program. It helped me to get to know other people who weren't drinking. And to get their experiences and feedback from similar situations they had been in. Good luck on your journey.

Sorry that happened to you. Sometimes making changes for the better may also include ending relationships with people that aren't 100% on board. Take care of yourself first!

I think when she sobers up she and her BF are going to realize how stupid they acted. I'd give some serious thought to "firing" her as a bridesmaid. What a loser.

I've been sober forty years. Most people were v. supportive of my quitting, but some were threatened and they were the ones I think had problems of their own with alcohol and needed me to drink with them. So glad I didn't.

Good for you for making the choice to do what's best for you. I'm sooo sorry your friend was acting that way. Hopefully she doesn't behave that way at your wedding and she apologizes before then!

Unfortunately or fortunately when you change something like this, you'll notice which friends stick around or which will quickly go. Fortunately for you, this friend seems like bad news anyway. When I stopped smoking and stopped partying, I quickly realized who were my true friends and who were just there for the party. Those friends that I partied with had nothing else in common with me.

Congratulations. Stay the course.

As far as your drunken friends and their unprofessional, uneducated, unwelcome opinions are concerned, tell yourself that you have absolutely no reason to seriously dissect the potential validity of the comments made by those who, the morning after, probably couldn't remember any specifics...at all.

Drunk is drunk, and drunk is usually foggy the next day. Don't buy into anything they said. You, sweet lady, are the individual who calls the shots for your body. You control your brain, you control what goes in your mouth, and you control your destiny. You're doing just fine -- in fact, you're doing better than fine. If you were my daughter, I'd give you a hug and tell you that I was more proud of you than you could possibly realize.