I never thought I would be this person. I know that no one will care about the wedding the way I do. I totally accept that and am fine with that. I'm just tired of cattiness and drama, I'm not that type of person and I never have been. I honestly don't have many girlfriends for that reason; because I can be blunt most of the time. My cousin, who is a bridesmaid is causing so much drama between my mom and myself. My cousin doesn't currently have a job right now, because she called in too much at her old job; I was planning on just sending the information for Azazie dresses this week. That way they can order whenever they feel like, plus I think they have a sale during the holidays in case anyone wanted to take advantage of that. My parents and cousin have completely discouraged me from sending anything this week. They keep saying you don't need to do this, you are right I don't. But my MOH and my other bridesmaid have been asking about it so they can save up money and my MOH wants to take advantage of the sale during the holidays. My cousin literally asked me to wait till she has money to send anything. I guess I don't understand why I can't send it then she can buy it when she has the money.
My cousin also texted me this morning, she and her ex-husband are not getting along well and are having issues with their custody arrangement. She told she had hired another attorney to represent in the case and told me the retainer when we were drinking one night. I work at a law firm as a legal assistant and thought what she paid was crazy, but not my business. So this morning she texted me asking me a question about placement, I can't give her legal advice (it's against the law) and the family law attorney I work for is on vacation this week. So I asked her why she doesn't contact her attorney. She said she didn't have an attorney, which is also one of the reasons she listed as to why she can't afford her dress right now. As I said it doesn't matter when she buys the dress, she buy it whenever she wants to. She then told me my wedding is a major burden on her. My mom is paying for her hotel room, my cousin's kids outfits for the wedding, I am paying for everyone's hair to be done and all my cousin needs to purchase is 109 dollar dress in the next year. I'm so beyond hurt right now. I'm trying not to cry at work, I don't want to burden anyone or have my wedding be a burden on anyone. I honestly feel like my MOH is the only one who even cares about my feelings. My other bridesmaid is having health problems so I don't want to bother her. I honestly feel bad even bothering my MOH too. My FH is telling me I'm not a burden and not asking much from them. But I feel so guilty about everything.
