Kids at Your Wedding

I have decided to not invite kids so everyone can enjoy themselves. I also feel like when people start drinking they stop watching there kids and you don't want to have to babysitting anyone children. I only have my kids coming and they can have one friend each so they are not alone.

My husband and I both have large families/friend groups and did not invite children under the age of 10. We called and personally explained the situation to those with young children. They all understood and appreciated the call. We also were going to have a children's suite on site (our venue is a bed and breakfast) with childcare to help accommodate those who might have difficulty making arrangements. We had to postpone due to COVID but still had a small church ceremony on our original date (the only child there was the flower girl). We wanted to ensure that our guests knew we loved them and their children...but this is how we wanted our wedding.

To not invite children, you do not include their names on the envelope/s. When the replies are sent back, you contact anyone who ignored that part and tell guests you are not able to accommodate their children but you are looking forward to seeing them.

We also opted for no kids. I talked to people who had kids and they were completely fine with our decision. I only heard a couple people complain about having to pay for a babysitter, but the vast majority is excited to have a kid free night to themselves.


We used a website for our RSVPs and we put the no kid information on the RSVP page.

We had to make the very tough decision of having a child free reception, it’s only a few hours we figured the parents can definitely get a sitter so they can enjoy themselves for the night.

Before DH and I were married, we attended a few weddings where children were invited. The experience helped us make the decision to NOT have children at our ceremony and reception. What I have learned from those experiences is some people expect you to provide daycare so they can have a good time. When we made the final decision to have an open bar, that really sealed the deal for us. This is just my personal opinion, but parents CANNOT be effective parents AND consume alcohol.

With that said, on our invitation, it read Adult Ceremony & Reception. As an added note for those parents with adult children living at home, on our RSVP card, we noted 2 (two) seats have been reserved for you. Yes, we had A LOT of push back, but we kept having flashbacks of children screaming, running/poking their fingers in the cake, putting their hands in the chocolate fountain, etc.

Mine will be 21+ except for nieces and nephews. Doing this cut out about 60 0-20 year olds from my guest list! Whew!

A family friend that had an adults only wedding wrote a little note on their wedding website that said something like "we love your kids but thought you'd like a night off. Adults only please." We plan to do something similar along with addressing invites to the names of those invited. I think its a cute, lighthearted way to address it!

We originally planned on inviting kids, but now with covid we are cutting our list alot and have decided to have a more intimate wedding. So when we send our wedding invites next we will not be in inviting kids on the invites. Also will be putting an insert with mee guidelines and rules by rhe venue and letting our guests know that we can no longer accommodate kids

We did invite kids, but if we hadn’t it would have made it very very difficult for my brother and my best friend to attend, and having them there was more important to me than not having kids there. However, I think it’s entirely up to the couple and anyone who takes offense at their kids not being invited is welcome to not attend.

In terms of letting people know, I think a “we have reserved x seats in your honour” on the RSVP card is a nice way to let people know without outright saying “no kids”. You’re always going to get people who will cross that number out and add others in, but people do that for adult guests as well. That gets a “sorry, you must have misunderstood, the invitation was only for x and y and unfortunately we are unable to accommodate any additional guests. If this means you are unable to attend we will miss you,” phone call.