Kids at the bridal shower drama

Kids came to my bridal shower and it made it more fun. They loved handing me gifts, "helping", and playing with the bows. I have a great picture of me opening presents with all these little girls sitting around me. At one point we handed one a camera and they were some of the funniest pictures. If you don't have a problem with them being there then don't worry about it. Just tell fsil that of course they were included in the invitation and that there might be more children coming.

ETA: these kids are also your future family so sil needs to step back for a second.

I'm confused. I don't know your sister plus this is text so I can't tell how she is asking that but it looks like it's just a question. Who cares if she's planning it. If you want her their with her kids tell her yea they are on the invite list.

It just sounds like an honest question. Don't read drama in until it happens. Simply respond to sil "fsil kids are x and x ages and yes they're invited."

I'm worried about other people's kids. Should I have listed them explicitly on the invite list? If my FSIL brings her kids will other people be upset that they didn't bring theirs? What if they do anyway? It would definitely change the numbers

Depends on the theme of the shower. If it's a kitchen shower, let them come. If it's a lingerie shower, a definite NO.

When they RSVP they should give your SIL a number right? Like when my one cousin RSVP'd for mine she said 4, meaning her and her 3 kids. Won't others do that too? If not, just have your fsil ask for how many when they RSVP.

It is at a country club

Seriously? Kids take away from the bride? Nothing takes away from the bride. Tons of people have kids... literally. If you are okay with the kids being there... than just say "Just say yes, the kids are on the guest list" and leave it alone. No more explanation on your part is necessary. Unless it is at a bar, is a pure romance party, or you plan on it being a kegger.... there's no reason children would be a hindrance unless you flat out just don't like kids. Some people don't... to each their own.

I'm confused. SIL is planning/hosting your shower. YOU know FSIL was bringing kids. Did SIL know this???

If the invitations went out and they weren't extended to children, why do you think people would bring them anyway? If I was invited to a bridal shower at our Country Club, and the invitations was addressed to me only, no part of me would think it was appropriate to bring my kids along??? Sorry....I seem to be missing something or not understanding this based on what PP have said?

My FSIL was up in the air if she was coming for sure until recently so I didn't want it to become an issue I'd it didn't end up happening. I agree @KelleyH, I wouldn't bring my kids to a country club shower either, but now that my FSIL is planning on bringing her kids I'm wondering if others will follow a similar logic and assume they can bring their kids too.

I responded to my SIL, told her my FSIL 2 girls were invited and apologized for not thinking about kids when I gave her the bridal shower invitation list. I also asked her if other people had RSVP'D with kids. No response yet...

I went through something similar. So my shower was a surprise i had no idea the guest list. At my shower all but on of my fail didnt bring her kids. She made sure to bitch to me the entire time how unfair it was she couldn't bring hers. No one ever said she couldn't she just assumed and didnt ask where others did. I would just let them come. Are the children behaved?

I don't think I've ever been to a bridal shower, even if the gift registry was at Bed, Bath & Beyond registry, where someone didn't give a joke gift or something sexy. I went to my cousin's shower and some gave her a little, see-though nightie, with a matching thong. The groom's grandmother actually clutched her pearls.

My Mom told me that someone in her cousin's bridal party saw fit to invite all the bride's relatives to a shower and they also hired a stripper. An aunt almost died of embarrassment.

She might just be asking to have an accurate head count for food.

Unless the kids are specifically named on the invitation, people shouldn't be assuming it's a free for all to bring their kids. That's how invitations work- only people named on the envelope are invited.

Most showers I've attended have had maybe a couple of kids, if any. Usually just flower girls or nieces of the bride and that's it. Definitely not everyone's kids.

I hosted a shower a few months ago and we invited the two flower girls only. They were named on the invitation. No one else brought kids or asked to bring their kids.

It was a sit down tea party in a condo party room. Too many kids running around would not have worked well and they would have been bored.

If you want to make an exception for your future nieces, I think that would be fine. It shouldn't mean everyone else can bring their kids and I don't think people would be upset.