Just the two of you.

Do YOU want this? You gave a lot of reasons why your FH likes it but I think both of you need to be on the same page. I think it's truly as simple as just doing what you both want.

We had 20 - we decided that because we did not want to pay for a big wedding and wanted to spend the money in other ways. I am also not big on being the center of attention, so doing the ceremony in front of 20 members of his and my family was way better than dealing with 100+ friends and family. We do not plan at this time to do any additional wedding celebration or vow renewal. We may look at it again in a few years if we feel we "missed out" but overall have no plans to do so. I LOVE other people's weddings and always have a great time, but it just wasn't what I wanted for myself.

DH mostly wanted to do what made me happy, but was also happy to not spend all the money for a large wedding.

@Spaghetti: I wouldn't be devastated, but I honestly wouldn't be ecstatic either. I've always dreamed of the big wedding, and I was happy at 50 too. This just doesn't fit in with the dream/vision I had, but at the end of the day, I would married to him, so that would make me happy.

@dedodara: So, did DH want a large wedding? My FH is the same as you! He hates being in front of people!

Are you set on July 2018? I think you should take some time to reflect on it and make sure you'd truly be okay and not have any regrets. However you're also less than a year from July 2018 and would need to get moving ASAP.

That is the date that we are leaning towards, and we have been in contact with all our vendors and they all have a soft hold on that date for us, i.e. they message us and let us know if someone is looking at that date. Everyone is still available (so far).

Also, just a note, this isn't about money. I think it's more about him being anxious. I just wanted to know how other people made the choice to have small weddings.

We initially planned to do a regular wedding but were really struggling with location. No matter where we would have chosen to have the wedding, it would have been a destination wedding for probably 85% of our guest list. So then we decided on a small destination wedding in St Lucia. After that, we found out his parents would not be able to attend due to some health issues with his father. I did not want to do a wedding with just my side present so we scratched the whole thing and threw our hats in for a weddingmoon at Sandals with just the two of us. We are having parties both in my hometown and his, so if you decide this, just remember that the party is the majority of the cost so don't go to crazy on the weddingmoon investment!

Jaylynn, I am so sorry to hear about your father in law! Thank you for sharing what you did! If we have the reception when we get back, we will definitely be sure to save for that. I guess I just don't want to regret not having the wedding of my dreams.