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Merline
Super February 2020

Junior Bridesmaids

Merline, on September 15, 2019 at 1:54 AM Posted in Family and Relationships 0 20
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I was a bridezilla today! After 10 months of being engaged and planning it happened. We are 5 months out and all of my BM are finally on the ball and picking up/ordering their dresses. Well one of my JBM HATES dresses so her mom asked me if she could wear a jumpsuit and sent me a pic. I told her that was fine because when I was growing up, you couldn't catch me in a dress EVER so I know how she feels. So I sent the picture of the jumpsuit to my sister, since my niece is my other JBM, so she could have an idea of what the other JBM is wearing and my sister goes off on me. "Oh that jumpsuit is ugly and I will not let my daughter wear something like that in a wedding. Why would anyone want to where a jumpsuit that's in a bridal party. If you want my daughter to wear a jumpsuit we will both attend as guest." She then sends the picture of the girl to all her friends (who have never had a wedding including her) and she telling them "look at this ugly jumpsuit my sister is allowing a JBM to wear. No one in her bridal party is taking this wedding seriously." She then sends me the screenshot of the conversation that she had with her friends to me, telling me that no one is taking the wedding seriously and asked me if I am really allowing her to wear this jumpsuit. I went off on her! I told her that I'm not forcing anyone to wear anything they are not comfortable in, jumpsuits are cute and can be dressed up, I told her the jumpsuit is what she is comfortable and confident wearing. I told her telling me to tell that girl to wear a dress is like me asking her to wear heels even though I know it kills her lower back and if she doesn't wear heels than she's not taking the wedding seriously. I told her if she and my niece want to attend as guest now then she and her whole family can just stay at home. I don't understand how a jumpsuit can get you so upset that you and your daughter are willing to get back out the bridal party. The girl is literally walking down the aisle, taking a seat during the ceremony then walking back down when the ceremony is over then will sit with her parents at the reception. If the jumpsuit is going to ruin your night then dont bother. I also told her that everyone has ordered or has gone to a store to get their outfits and I dont know what she or my niece is wearing and not to bother picking up anything as she has taken themselves out. She did apologize and say they will have their outfits picked out by next Saturday and if I take my niece out of the bridal party it would crush her. At this point I wish I didn't have a bridal party or just had my best friend and cousin and been done. Sorry for the rant but FH didn't help, he sees the stress she causes me and just needed another reason to curse her out. I didn't let him. Ugh today was too much.

20 Comments

Latest activity by Megan, on September 15, 2019 at 10:35 PM
  • Megan
    Super October 2020
    Megan ·
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    That’s so wicked! I can’t believe she would make fun of another girl like that! And then show you all of the convos! It sounds like you matched her reaction. (Just here to validate you!!)

    Can the JBM wear different outfits? One in a jumpsuit and one in a dress?
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  • Megan
    Super October 2020
    Megan ·
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    BTW, I think jumpsuits are really cute and they’re really “in” right now. My MOH is either going to wear a jumpsuit or a suit. (She won’t be caught dead in a dress lol)
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  • Mrs. Bubba
    VIP September 2019
    Mrs. Bubba ·
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    You can’t force a child to: do, say, or wear anything. My standard line is “once they can roll over, it’s a complete wrap for you getting what you want”. Because, once you get back to them, they could’ve rolled to the Kitchen if you’re gone too long.
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  • Merline
    Super February 2020
    Merline ·
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    Yes the other one will wear a dress. My sister did the courthouse thing 15 years ago. The only wedding she's ever been in was her best friend's wedding like 20 years ago. That best friend was a bridezilla! Everyone had to wear the same outfit, have the same hair, same shoes, have the same makeup look, etc. Its 2019/2020 some BM dont even wear the same colors anymore. I called my mom and she believes my sister is living vicariously through me because she had something to say my whole planning process. This is not the first time she told me that "no one is taking your wedding seriously." Yes I would like the day to go as smooth as possible, but as long as I marry my best friend, I could careless what everyone thinks.
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  • Merline
    Super February 2020
    Merline ·
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    Yes I know! I sent her pics of other jumpsuits that David's Bridal sales and she just kept saying "you will not catch my daughter in a jumpsuit." I never told her my niece had to be in a jumpsuit, I was just showing her what the other JBM is wearing. Also, I'm sure your MOH will rock that jumpsuit or suit!
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  • Merline
    Super February 2020
    Merline ·
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    Exactly! I feel so bad for my niece!
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  • Megan
    Super October 2020
    Megan ·
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    That’s so viscous and uncalled for, especially since you’re not mandating what her daughter wears.

    Thanks!! She really will look awesome! And so will all of your bridal party!! 💕
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  • Ivy ORP
    VIP October 2019
    Ivy ORP ·
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    First, forcing any child into a dress is mean and in today's society we should know better. Second, jumpsuits are super cute. I know plenty of women that don't feel comfortable in dresses but would rock a jumpsuit. Third, no one wants to lose control and come off as Bridezilla, but in my opinion, this one was justified. It does sound right that your sister is living through your wedding and flips when her vision isn't yours. As for dictating that her daughter won't be caught wearing a jumpsuit, I wouldn't even know how to respond to that. That seems pretty over-reactionary. I hope it settles down and you can all enjoy your day peacefully.

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  • Nicole
    Super October 2021
    Nicole ·
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    Wow! What is your sisters deal?? Jumpsuits can be considered very classy....I wore one to a wedding this weekend and received several compliments (also wasn't the only person in one).


    I think it's great that you're being so accommodating to your bridal party and allowing everyone to feel comfortable. Your sister is being petty for no reason and should not have sent out the screenshot....She's an adult and should know better.


    I hope it all works out for you! I think you handled the situation correctly.

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  • Ali
    Expert March 2021
    Ali ·
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    That's awful. People can be so mean...I kept my wedding party to both of my sister's as my bridesmaids. I was going to have some of my friends but then they were flaky and I didn't want drama or have to count on people that have shown me I can't. Small wedding party is awesome. 4 total between me and my FH and no more than 60 guests. I honestly think that a jumpsuit is a cute idea especially for people who don't like dresses. They are becoming popular for brides as well.
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  • Andrea
    Master January 2021
    Andrea ·
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    Yeah, your sister went way too far, sending the screenshot of the jumpsuit to other people. It isn't her wedding. It's yours. And you want the other junior bridesmaid to feel comfortable, so it's such a good thing that you're being accommodating to her. That is really, REALLY good. Your sister should not be concerned as to what anyone else in the wedding party is wearing. She should worry about her own child (your niece) and done. That's where it should just end. Sigh... I am sorry you were met with such negativity. I hope everything turns out great for you.Smiley heart

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  • Merline
    Super February 2020
    Merline ·
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    Exactly! She'll get over it. I really dont know where she got that no one was taking the wedding seriously. She already knows that I just want everyone to come out and celebrate with me. We plan on taking our vows seriously and that's all that matters to me 🤷🏾‍♀️.
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  • Merline
    Super February 2020
    Merline ·
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    Thank you! The sad thing is she's 10 years older than me and for her to come at me like that really throw me for a loop! I'm sure everything will go well and if she needs to sit with the guest then I will put her there and not stress myself.
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  • Merline
    Super February 2020
    Merline ·
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    I tried to explain that to her, but to her they are ugly and tacky. I've made it my mission to find a jumpsuit for my send off outfit! I wish I only had my best friend and cousin in my bridal party. We have 115 people invited, I have a lot of family members.
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  • Merline
    Super February 2020
    Merline ·
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    Thank you so much. I hit her with a "k" and ended the conversation. I really dont even know why the outfit had her in her feelings like that.
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  • Courtney
    Master December 2019
    Courtney ·
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    First of all your sister is absolutely vile for criticizing a young girl who is trying to build self- confidence. Then to spread this amongst people who aren't even a part of your wedding is even worse.

    What you sent her was a suggestion, not a command, and she should've realized that. I would keep her on probation but not let this affect your niece.

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  • Merline
    Super February 2020
    Merline ·
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    Exactly! I asked her why would you share this with 1. people who are not part of the bridal party, 2. people who have never been married or been part of a bridal party and 3. people who are not paying for this wedding. She had absolutely nothing to say. I know if I tell my niece she is not longer part of the bridal party it would crush her, but as for my sister she can sit next to her husband as a guest! I've never seen someone act so evil because of a 12 year old wanting to wear a jumpsuit!
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  • Courtney
    Master December 2019
    Courtney ·
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    When I was 13 my older cousin got married and I flat out refused to wear a “girly” dress. We’ve all been there and it sucks. Your JrBM is going to look so chic and grown up.
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  • Merline
    Super February 2020
    Merline ·
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    Thank you! I totally agree.
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  • Megan
    Expert October 2019
    Megan ·
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    1. You're awesome with how supportive you are of your JBM. She is lucky to have you in her life.
    2. Totally justified. I see no Bridezilla moment. You defended your JBM, some people would have done nothing.

    Dont get discouraged. Your day will be wonderful, I'm sure and life will go on. Smiley smile Let it roll as best as you can.
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