Is this typical venue behavior??

Dates go quickly at popular venues. Don't get so hung up on the date - look for the perfect venue and then see what they have available!

Tour the venue and ask what dates they have available, then choose from the available dates.

They are not going to decline someone else's money because you are interested in that date but have no contract/deposit down yet.

I literally put down my deposit for our date as another bride waited for a tour to book the same date. Unfortunately I had the card out faster and got it done before her. Sometimes the venue hunt is cut throat.

Venues wont hold dates without a deposit. They probably emailed you as soon as another couple put down thei deposit. How else would you have liked them to handle it?

Sorry to hear you had to travel all that way and also your date was taken. Like the others said unless you signed a contract and put a deposit down that is the only way to get your date. Depending on where you are located a lot of places fill up fast and even take booking atleast two years in advance. I did you said it's a new venue so others were probably booking right away. Have you looked into other venues or possibly open to another date?

That happened to us too. We were hoping for April 8 as a wedding date but right after our tour, someone put a deposit down for that date. While I understand that we hadn't put any down and it wasn't ours so they had every right to book it with someone else, I wish I had known that other people were asking about that date. I was so sad but we ended up booking it for 7 months later. Lol it sucks but that's how it goes.

Thanks everyone for your input! That definitely helps put it in perspective for me that this is just the way the game is played. I'm still going to tour the venue and if it is as dreamy in person as it is online, hopefully one of the other dates available will work.

It would be better to have a preferred season/time of year instead of a specific date(s) when looking for venues. That way you can really find a place you love and know how many dates they have available. We quickly learned this in our search as the date we originally wanted was booked solid everywhere.

@JessicaR - that's exactly how I feel, that I wish I had known it was a date of interest and I would have sent my fiancé to view it during the week! This venue hunt is something else!! So glad you were able to book it after all!

I think it depends on the venue. We emailed ours with when we would come in to tour and our date we wanted. 2 days before we got an email to check in on us becuase they had another couple want to book that day . They wanted to make sure we were still coming to give us the first option to book on said day. We assured them we were coming and they held it for us. We viewed and booked that day with no problem .

OP, a couple could have toured that day (and were interested in a few dates) and booked it the same day they toured. It is possible that they couldnt have given you a heads up sooner. Also, on the flip side Ive heard couples complain when vendors do tell them that others are interested in the date because they perceived it as manipulative and put extra pressure on them.

@flying holy crap that's crazy!

Yeah, I'm with everyone else. No deposit=no date. It is frustrating that you traveled so far to have your wanted date booked up. You'll just have to pick from the available dates and put a deposit down asap if you're really wanting that venue. Good luck!!

Nothing is secured until that deposit is made unfortunately so yes that is the norm. Many persons schedule viewings and never book or never show. It is purely a first come first served (booked) basis. Hopefully you still went and saw the place, loved it and picked another date. All the best.

We had 3 other couples interested in our date, the day after we toured. I called and pod a deposit even though we planned on going in the next week to sign paperwork. I didn't want to risk losing the date since there were only 2 days left that weren't week days in May

@Autumn- I felt bad but that was the last available Saturday until October or November I think and those months wouldn't work because I want my little sister there but she's in dental school so I had to work with when she wasn't in school.

It's unpleasant, but it's a popular time of year and that is the norm. I have had three couples in the last week call me for dates we'd spoken about before Christmas and all three of those dates are gone.

I hope you can get another date there if you really love it!

Amen to @flying soon. Our vendor was super nice and told us she would reach out if someone else wanted the date first since we showed interest first. I didn't have the type of experience as some of you.

I was really hung up on having our wedding on 5/20, as it is FHs moms bday and she passed.. it wasn't doable so went with the next best option for us, despite it being a year later than we originally wanted. Life moves on. You're marrying the love of your life. Don't worry too much on the date.

You can still tour the venue. There are always lots to choose from. Hope you find the one!

Deposits are the only surefire way to lock in your date with ANY vendor, not just the venue. From what I've experienced, October is the new May as far as weddings go, so when we got engaged last October I started reaching out to vendors pretty much immediately. By Thanksgiving I had my florist and venue booked, and by New Years I had the photographer, videographer and DJ booked too. Good luck and happy planning!

Shit happens. It happened to us as well. You don't have a date until you have a contract and put down money. Sorry you traveled so far.

It's a rat race for venues! Unfortunately this isn't abnormal.