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Pat
Rockstar May 2023

Is this tacky?

Pat, on September 18, 2021 at 5:06 PM Posted in Planning 0 24

Okay, so again I'm on my 'invitation' kick. <grin> I am going with pocket invitations, which has a ton of information right there for our guests. I am playing around with the "dinner" portion of the card. I will actually describe the 3 entree choices, so guests will know what "beef" , "chicken" and "fish" actually entail. We are paying for beer, wine and soda. The venue cannot do a cash bar.

So - taking all that in to consideration, is it tacky to PUT that on the invite? Like "All entrees will include a house salad, beer, wine and soft drinks. A cash bar is not available."

I thought it would save a ton of confusion, since there IS an actual BAR in the venue, but it will only be serving the yacht club patrons who are dining there in the private dining room, NOT any other guests. (Yacht club members have a standing account - the bar does not handle cash or credit card transactions)

Thanks for your input! I have a LOT of time to think about this. Smiley laugh

24 Comments

Latest activity by Valerie, on September 20, 2021 at 1:07 PM
  • C
    Super July 2020
    Cool ·
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    I would not include the alcohol information.
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  • H
    Master July 2019
    Hannah ·
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    I have never seen alcohol listed on the invitation. Just include the meal choices, since I am assuming you need the pre-counts. If you don't need pre-counts, you can skip that to and just have the menu available for them to choose from day of. Sometimes less is more, and too much information can just create more confusion.
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  • Jasmine S.
    VIP May 2022
    Jasmine S. ·
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    I think a separate meal card that describes the entrees is fine. For example "Grass-fed filet with roasted potato and carrots," if you think beef isn't enough. I agree to skip the detailed drink info, though. Cash bars are generally considered rude and not expected (in the US anyway) so there would be no need to specify you're not doing one.
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  • Michelle
    Rockstar December 2022
    Michelle ·
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    The only thing that goes on the invite is your names and the date/time/location. It is awesome that you are planning to be descriptive with the meals because everyone says don’t tell guests what they are being served beyond “beef”, “chicken” etc and those can be anything. If someone prefers steaks and they get ribs, they may have ordered the chicken in hindsight but there is no way to know without explicit information which they brides are told is overstepping. The meal selection goes on the reply card, along with the names of the invited guests. In addition to them knowing who is invited, it lets you know who sent them because not everyone writes their names on the reply card.


    It is completely unnecessary to mention salad and bar selection. Guests will find out when they arrive.
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  • Alyssa
    Super December 2021
    Alyssa ·
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    Wait, so the Venue serves alcohol but won’t serve your event? This makes no sense.
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  • Pat
    Rockstar May 2023
    Pat ·
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    The venue is a private club. They have private dining for their members. The EVENT room, where weddings are held, is open for nonmembers to book. The venue will serve alcohol, no worries. What they CAN'T do is a cash bar for wedding guests who do not want wine or beer (which we are providing) The bar only accepts members' accounts as payment. Understand? My concern is having wedding guests passing through the MEMBER dining area, seeing the bar and thinking they can 'belly up' for a mixed drink.

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  • Pat
    Rockstar May 2023
    Pat ·
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    We are not doing a cash bar nor asking people to pay for their drinks. We will provide beer and wine. My concern is the bar in the MEMBERS dining room, which wedding guests will see. This bar can not take cash or credit cards, as it only accepts a club members account. I guess I worry that people will assume they can get a drink of their choice there rather than what is provided.

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  • Cece
    Rockstar October 2023
    Cece ·
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    This is such a strange situation. So the venue has a full bar but will only allow you to serve beer and wine at your event? Why?? I think you are correct in thinking your guests will want to order cocktails at the bar. I definitely would, especially since I hate beer and wine!
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  • Pat
    Rockstar May 2023
    Pat ·
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    I am choosing to serve only beer and wine. The venue would certainly serve mixed drinks if I pay for an open bar - but that isn't in my budget. I guess my guests who hate beer or wine will have to just have the soft drinks provided. ~shrug~

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  • Jasmine S.
    VIP May 2022
    Jasmine S. ·
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    Maybe the venue can put up a sign or rope across that room that says "Club Members Only" or something? So wedding guests know it's just off limits.
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  • Pat
    Rockstar May 2023
    Pat ·
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    Hmmmmmm, that may be doable!! It would have to be done after the cocktail hour, but I will definitely talk to the coordinator. Thanks, I never thought of this idea.

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  • Michelle
    Rockstar December 2022
    Michelle ·
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    I hate beer and wine also as so many people we know. In that situation, we would be happy with Cokes. For our own wedding, we are serving liquor and sodas because no one will drink beer or wine.
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  • Katie
    VIP August 2020
    Katie ·
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    I think on the wedding website and through word of mouth would be best way to communicate the bar will be serving beer, wine, soft drinks and water to guests. 🥂❤️🍺
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  • ALMESHIA
    Savvy October 2021
    ALMESHIA ·
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    While I’ve been experiencing guest not FULLY reading the invite information (keep it simple), in your case it’s exactly what I suggest you do. It is NOT TACKY.
    To keep your guest from the embarrassment of being turned down at the bar, you should add that information to the invite.
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  • Hannah
    Dedicated October 2021
    Hannah ·
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    If I’m understanding this situation properly, I would choose to not have my reception at an event where some guests will receive dinner/drink service and others don’t? Or.. maybe I’m misunderstanding this?
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  • Hannah
    Dedicated October 2021
    Hannah ·
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    Oh I misunderstood! Disregard my last comment. But I wouldn’t put any of that information on the invitation bc I think it will contribute to the confusion. I would just maybe put a sign on the bar (if there isn’t one already) saying that that bar is for club members only.
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  • Pat
    Rockstar May 2023
    Pat ·
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    Smiley heart Smiley heart Thanks everyone for your input! I will DEFINITELY talk to the venue coordinator and discuss either a sign on the bar or some type of roping system indicating it is for club members only. I won't put the 'restriction' on the carded insert in the wedding invitation packet, but may put it on my website.

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  • CountryBride
    VIP April 2022
    CountryBride ·
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    I would leave drinks off the invitation
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  • Rosie
    Master February 2022
    Rosie ·
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    I wouldn't mention it on the invite or the wedding website. I'd just have the MC raise it along with all the other 'housekeeping' type stuff like where the bathrooms and fire exits or whatever are at the beginning of the evening.

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  • C
    Savvy April 2023
    Chelsea ·
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    Don't mention it on the invite, it's too complicated to convey away, as evidenced by this thread. Just make sure the venue signage is clear. Unsolicited suggestion: keep your current alcohol package (beer and wine) but pay extra for one signature cocktail, like a margarita or something.

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