Is this...fun?

You are definitely not alone. Planning is pretty bad for me too. I have a constant pit in my stomach & I’m off - I’m always thinking of the budget (FH & I are paying for everything), everything feels like a trial - even small things like the father/daughter dance song. My dad has veto every song that I selected & so far the only song that he has suggested is Sail On, by the Commanders (which I’m pretty sure is a divorcee song). The guest list cause me constant grief.

Sorry you’re having a hard time. I can’t imagine how rough things are to cause you to cry for 15 min 😐

I have a principle about everything wedding related: if it doesn’t bring me joy & I dread doing it, I don’t do it (unless absolutely necessary, like getting a marriage license lol). Your wedding can be anyway you want it, you don’t have to do things just because they’ve been done that way or because other people are doing them. Do your own thing, do what makes you happy & what makes everything less stressful & more exciting.
At the end of the day, the whole purpose of a wedding is for you & FH to get married. Everything else is optional 🙂

View Quoted Comment I 10000% agree with you! We are paying ourselves as well and have made some bad financial decisions in terms of the wedding that have set us back. So now we are being even more conscious then we were before and its just A LOT of stress as you know! Funny I actually discussed with my dad the song that I want us to dance to (landslide by stevie nicks/fleetwood mac) and he said he’d get back to me if he approves or not. Like what!?

View Quoted Comment You’re absolutely right, I honestly don’t even know where all this grief is stemming from. Like yea im a little stressed but it just poured out of me today. I’m definitely giving myself a break for awhile just to table it and come back to it in a few weeks!

Lol so far my dad has vetoed: brown eye girl, In my life from the Beatles, Imagine by John Lennon - and he has vetoed all as being too corny.

You're not alone - my FH and I have definitely had periods of "this is not fun" while planning. I always like to take immediate action to change the situation that's bothering me, whereas FH is more of a "step back and breathe" kind of person, so it's been a bit of a rollercoaster. Just remember there is a solution out there to every problem as long as you're willing to be flexible. Don't get too bogged down with the little details and try to accept what you can't change while finding things you can do to figure things out. All the irritation will be worth it as long as you find a way to be happy about what the day turns into. Good luck!

View Quoted Comment You and I are the same! My FH is very hands off when it comes to planning, i’ll bring to him and issue and want to resolve it before things get worse and he’s definitely more lax when it comes to these things lol.

View Quoted Comment What!? Lol those are all beautiful choices in my opinion! Hopefully you guys can find something you both love!

You're definitely not alone. I feel like planning has such extreme ups and such extreme downs. Whenever I've been feeling like it's been down for a while, I always try to ask myself what I can do to fix that. If you can try to identify specifically what it is that is wrong (even if it's a whole list of things!) and then work on what you can do to fix each one individually, it makes things a lot less overwhelming. Even if what you can do to "fix" something is either (1) decide you don't need it or (2) just let it be.

I feel like this is something that can be applied to anything in life when you are unhappy! It's a lot easier to work towards making yourself happier once you've narrowed down what it is in particular that's making you unhappy, rather than just allowing yourself to feel like the entire experience itself is miserable!

Good luck!

You are absolutely not alone. I'm generally a really laid back person, but I have had multiple break downs over the cost of things. I balled my eyes out at our florist because of the cost. I'm constantly thinking about how all this money is x amount of rent payments, or electric bills, cable, etc. We found making me leave the room when it comes time to talk costs has helped a little but I still know its insanely expensive to have a wedding. If there is someone who can be with you for all the planning so they can take over if it gets too much or its affecting you negatively I would definitely recommend it. Sometimes just having someone else there to be excited for you helps a lot.

Well I can't complain. Small courthouse ceremony and small family gathering after and nothing traditional at all... But that doesn't mean I have the pit in my stomach. I am actually paying for it all, since FH deals with most of the bills (we live together) and I have two jobs that I get to save more for the wedding I even work Saturdays.. I just want to sleep till late and be naked at home while having scrambled eggs... But no. I have a wedding to pay for and I need to work for that...

YES! I seriously don’t know how people do this for a living! I just try to remind myself that it will all be worth it!

View Quoted Comment Thank you!! i never thought of it like this but I will definitely take your advice because lately its been a struggle!! 💕

View Quoted Comment It’s honestly insane and borderline criminal how much things are costing. Like everyone knows that weddings are expensive but I have never been more taken aback! My FH though I love him to death is being super hands off with the whole process so one of my girlfriends suggested I give him tasks to handle so the whole weight of the situation isn’t just on me and won’t have me in hysterics all the time!

View Quoted Comment Haha I feel you girl!! Majority of my salary is paying for the wedding as well!

View Quoted Comment I used to want to do it for a living but after this nooo way lol but you are right, I can’t wait to just be his wife!!🥰

View Quoted Comment I agree, the costs are outrageous, every day I kick myself because I should have done something in a park or somewhere more or less free and just paid for a caterer, but it's too late for that now. I'm all for a beautiful wedding, but what really matters is actually getting married and celebrating with friends/family which doesn't require an expensive venue. I hope things get easier for you, having your FH help is a great idea, I know it's the brides day traditionally but I think it's just as much about you as a couple. I ask my FH for input on everything, I want him to have a good time too and enjoy the details/experience as much as I do.