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Beginner September 2024

Is there such thing as “too small” of a guest list

Taylor, on July 30, 2021 at 4:14 PM Posted in Planning 1 28

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I was chatting with a co worker of mine (male) who had gotten married within the last two years. He asked how many people I was inviting and I said 60. He replied “oh that’s a back yard wedding” and that where he got married had a minimum of 100 people. I don’t even know 100 people and my fiancé is only inviting the 4 family members he has and two friends. The rest is my family. I guess I’m just self conscious now that my gust list is too small for a nice venue. Has anyone else had this experience?

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Latest activity by Megan, on August 7, 2021 at 5:09 PM

Savvy May 2022
Sara · on July 30, 2021 at 4:19 PM
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I'm kind of having this issue as well, only have about 40 people, and trying to find a venue that's big enough, without being absolutely massive to where it's going to seem like nobody showed... everything around me seems like it's for 200+ or for 15-20. And I DON'T want a "backyard" wedding!
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Master July 2019
Hannah · on July 30, 2021 at 4:28 PM
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There is absolutely nothing wrong with a 60 person wedding. However, some more traditional venues (like hotel ballrooms/country clubs) may have minimums that are above that, especially for a weekend. That's not to say that every venue will have these minimums. You just have to check and see what's out there.
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Expert February 2021
Reena · on July 30, 2021 at 4:29 PM
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Because of COVID we cut out guest list and only had 35 guests. We originally planned on inviting 150.

I was disappointed by the cut at first, but the day ended up being fantastic with just our closest family and friends.
Our venue was the basement of a historic mansion. It had four different rooms, so, it didn’t feel empty.
Best of luck in planning.
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VIP July 2017
Becky · on July 30, 2021 at 4:30 PM
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We certainly didn't have a "backyard" wedding and we had a smaller number of people able to attend (larger invitation list, but still). Sounds like your coworker is just a judgy (and not so nice) person.
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Super September 2022
Ashlee · on July 30, 2021 at 4:37 PM
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I don't think that's too small or has to be relegated to a backyard wedding, but it does limit certain types of venues (like ballrooms) that are larger and those venues have minimums. In our search though, there were plenty of options that specialized in smaller numbers, and there are a lot more unique options for those 40-100 person events.
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VIP May 2022
Jasmine S. · on July 30, 2021 at 6:07 PM
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Many nice venues are doing smaller weddings now. My venue (literally a castle) has a micro-wedding package for 40 people. My best friend got married at a very nice country club with 32 guests. Ignore this guy. He's just one of those types who like to shame people for the choices they make about their weddings
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Savvy September 2022
Beth · on July 30, 2021 at 6:07 PM
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I'm having like 75 people at most and half of those are people under 18 so don't feel bad I'm having a formal venue and I'm doing all the formal stuff as I can so don't feel bad it's your wedding do what you want don't feel bad
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Dedicated August 2021
Jessica · on July 30, 2021 at 6:58 PM
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These are different times because of the pandemic. The number of attendees should not dictate what kind of wedding & celebration you have! Do it up if you want, you deserve it! Due to COVID we chose 50 people to attend our wedding. We booked a beautiful all inclusive venue & we are doing the whole sha-bang! It has been so fun to plan everything & see it come together. We laugh because 14 people out of the 50 are in our wedding party & will be standing with us so the audience will look a bit bare but we don't care!
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Legend March 2017
Pirate & 60s Bride · on July 30, 2021 at 8:29 PM
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That sounded derogatory! There’s nothing wrong with 60 guests. You can have quite the party with that number. That’s a great number—big enough to party but small enough to feel intimate. 🎉
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Master January 2019
Cassidy · on July 30, 2021 at 8:41 PM
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We invited 90 and had 64 people, including us. It was perfect! Don’t let others get you down.
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Super June 2019
Emilia · on July 31, 2021 at 3:31 AM
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Hi ! I just hate this type of comment, when I was saying we have 50 guests, people were suggesting that well.. nobody loves us then. I do know more people, but seriously, I don't think we can be CLOSE friends with 500 people ! We had a normal venue, not a backyard wedding, and I don't think we were few in the place...
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VIP October 2022
Samantha · on July 31, 2021 at 7:35 AM
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When someone says something like that, they are either being thoughtless or a jerk. There was no reason for him to say that. Even with the most generous interpretation, it comes off as dismissive.
A backyard wedding happens…in a backyard! There are backyard weddings that are bigger than that, a backyard is a location, not a comment on size.
You will have a fantastic wedding with 60 people!
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Rockstar November 2054
Jacks · on July 31, 2021 at 9:53 AM
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Not that there's anything wrong with backyard weddings, but that comment sounds like it was meant to be dismissive or competitive. 60 people sounds lovely! Have a wonderful day.
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Expert August 2021
Katie · on July 31, 2021 at 10:29 AM
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It's a good size wedding. Don't let people judge you into having more than you want. We are having 60 as well and everyone says it's a good size especially in these times.
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Expert August 2021
Katie · on July 31, 2021 at 10:33 AM
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I also agree with others that this guy sounds like a competitive jacka$$
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Beginner September 2024
Taylor · on July 31, 2021 at 11:03 AM
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Thank you! Makes me feel better
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Beginner September 2024
Taylor · on July 31, 2021 at 11:05 AM
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Thank you. Even if I did know 100+ people I don’t think they would be close enough to us to be at our wedding.
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Beginner September 2024
Taylor · on July 31, 2021 at 11:08 AM
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Exactly. My fiancé only has his 4 members of his immediate family and two friends that will be attending. The rest are MY family and a few friends lol. I have had so much fun looking for venues and planning. You’re wedding sounds like it will be beautiful!
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Master October 2021
Mrs.a · on August 1, 2021 at 8:51 PM
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Ummmmmm….nope! We’re having a very nice intimate wedding with approximately 30 people. Are you feeling insecure since his comment, because you shouldn’t! That was a rude remark.
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Just Said Yes November 2022
Danielle · on August 1, 2021 at 10:30 PM
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We are inviting around the same number. Many of the venues we’ve checked out have rooms/areas with 30 or 40 guest minimums, so I don’t think there’s anything wrong with 60!
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Is there such thing as “too small” of a guest list

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