Is 'No Babies & Toddlers' common sense?

No, never assume its common sense.

However, in all honesty.. if you're going to exclude some kids, you really need to make it an all or nothing kind of thing. Its very awkward to invite someones 5 year old, but not their 3 year old brother. A 4 or 5 year old is every bit as capable of tantrums as a 3 year old.

I think it's pretty rude to only invite "big kids" it's either all kids, or adult only. You could be splitting families up! Is it really fair to invite a 8 year old, and not his/her younger siblings?

If you gotta ask, then it's rude; even though I get where you're coming from. My ceremony & reception is adult only.

Just do 18+

1) Many people welcome kids of all ages at their wedding. There's no "common sense" rule to leave infants and toddlers at home. Some infants depend on their mom for milk.

2) It's ok to have adult only (18 up). It's not ok to split minor children. So if you're inviting Mom, Dad, and 12 year old kid, the baby should be invited too.

If you have an adult only wedding, be prepared for possibly more declines if you have people on your list who would have a harder time finding childcare.

And no, you're not responsible for childcare for out of towners.

I don't know about proper wording, but most new parents are aching to get some alone time. For me, we want to enjoy our friends wedding without the responsibility of bringing our kids. I think wording with the family or just the couple seems appropriate. If it were me, I'd either talk to that couple or make it completely kid free. Our rsvp cards have a space for number attending. If you address it to Mr and Mrs smith and they rsvp 3, give them a call. This is your wedding, as long as you're being reasonable with requests it's okay to pull the "it's my wedding" card. Good luck!

A teenager after a break up is as disruptive as a 2 year old. You either invite kids or you don't.

You can't split up a family. Parents of young children are MORE likely to bring them because they can't be away from their parents as long and/or the parents don't trust babysitters to stay with children that young. Its totally fine to have an adult (18+) wedding if you want! We did!

It's not common sense because it's not common in every family. All of my family weddings, adult birthday party's ( excluding ones at bars or late night) children/ babies are welcome. In my fiancé's family it's mostly adult only weddings and adult birthday parties. You can do what ever you want but expect a lot of parents being upset and possibly declining.

And sorry but 4 year olds are not "older" children, I work with 2-4 year olds and when it comes to noise or rowdiness the 4 years olds can be a lot more trouble.

My almost 4 year old niece is worse then her 2 year old sister when it comes to crying and stubbornness, just sayin'.

Be clear be very clear. Don't split up families. All or nothing.

I edited my original post, but I'll reiterate here: none of the guests on our guest list have kids of mixed age. They only have babies/toddlers, or no kids. So I wouldn't be in a position to split up any families. Not sure how that changes things...

It's still not fair to have some guest bring their children while others aren't allowed. Doesn't really changed anything, you'll get so many side eyes! ETA: If they only have toddlers or babies, then where did the "big Kids" come from? Are there "big kids" or not? Or did you just omit them because of the responses you got? I'm totally confused right now!

Again let parents decide on there own or no one under 18. Your reasons do not make since for the age range you have given. Even under 21 can cause problems.

Edit: wait what.? What " big" kids are there going to be if no one has any.......

If I wasn't allowed to bring a nursing infant with me but someone else had their five year old, I would be really upset. I'd go adults only or else everyone welcome.

This isn't common sense. You need to inform your guests (by addressing invitations properly, and putting on your website "adults only") clearly and consistently. If you want to recommend sitters for OOT guests, your website would be a great place to do that!

It's also ok to invite in circles, such as nieces and nephews only but not other kids. But if there's only a few on the entire guest list, I don't see the point in excluding them. An uncle could have a coughing fit just as easily as baby can start crying.

@Spazzy, no I'm not trying to split hairs about an age cut-off. There are no 4 year olds in any of the families of guests I'm inviting.

It sounds like since my guests are all either childless with a handful that have infants, I should just list "adults only" on my website. I was hesitant to do that, but if it's more polite to say that publicly, then I think that's what I'll do. Thanks for the input, y'all!

Newborns are sometimes exempt from the rule because of breastfeeding. I know when my son was a newborn, he only took milk from me. He hated the pumped stuff. A newborn would be much less disruptive than a 5 year old. He or she would probably sleep through everything.