Is it tacky to schedule my wedding on an anniversary of a friend?

It sounds like she thinks you guys are closer than you think you are. I wouldn’t ask her about the date. She doesn’t own dates, and you should be able to pick the one that you want. If you were closer I would say maybe make sure it’s okay first. I also don’t think you need to call and tell her anything. I don’t think she needs to be told she won’t be a bridesmaid. That’s unnecessary imo.

No one owns a date. Do not ask her. You are not going to change it if she says she minds, something she likely won't mention unless you bring it up. And never call someone , in friendship or business ess, to tell them why you did not choose someone for something. That is insulting. It someone asks, you can put a nice face on it and answer. But it is an aggressive move to tell her, unasked, why you do not value her. She can figure out for herself, that she rarely sees you now, and these other people you see more. Strengths of friendships vary over time, that is natural. And I sympathize with hoping not everyone you were a BM for expects to be in your wedding. People talked about that to me when I was engaged. Silly. My own wedding was the 40th I had been in. Other people were shocked I did not have all my sister's and FI's too, or first cousins. That may be reasonable if you have only been in 2 weddings, have 1 sister and one cousin. But when you have been in many weddings, or have large families, it is ridiculous. Standing at the altar with my 75 friends, sisters and cousins, right.

I would not bring this up. Just go ahead and book that date.

I would not ask her about the date, she will find out when she gets the STD or invite. Also if you had already come to terms with not asking her to be a bridesmaid I think you should stick with it. I think we all have friends that may feel closer to us than we do to them and that’s ok. It’s your day and you have to pick who you feel closest with and not worry about others feelings.

It sounds like you aren’t completely sure about not including her either. I had a similar issue and decided to make her son a ring bearer thinking that would relieve me of any guilt with not including her. It didn’t and it was weighing on me so I just gave in and asked. I immediately felt better! Just think about whether it’s her feelings your worries about or it’s your own guilt. If you really feel bad not having her by your side why not her?

I’d go with your date! We’re getting married on a favorite cousin’s first anniversary and when the late night snack arrives, we’re going to wish them a happy anniversary and have the DJ play their first song from their wedding.

If it is a close friend then yes find another date, unless that date means something to the two of you. If you aren’t that close then no it would not be tacky.

You don't need permission to have your wedding the same date . And if you aren't involving her in the wedding party there's no need to call her. Just send her an invite like you would do to all your guest. (after all you said you aren't close anymore)

You don't need permission to have your wedding on a certain date. I wouldn't mention it to her. If you don't want her in your bridal party, that's fine too - but I wouldn't make a big deal to her about either one.

Agree with everyone else that a person doesn’t own a date. I was in a wedding last Saturday that we had to travel across the country for and our first wedding anniversary was spent at their day after brunch and on a plane on Sunday. It wasn’t a big deal at all.

I couldn't care less if someone scheduled a wedding, party, etc. on our wedding anniversary, we would just schedule another day to celebrate. Not a big deal!

Book it. My wedding was on my best friend who was my moh birthday. It's not a huge deal.

It's definitely better to have this talk up front. I think you should call her and be honest with your feelings. Just tell her that you do still consider her a friend, but you weren't considering having her in your bridal party. She might be a little hurt, but if she's a good friend she will understand that you should do what you want with your wedding. I guess I don't know how she would react about the date since I don't know her.. I think it would be ridiculous to be mad about that, but some people get really defensive about dates. Either way, I think it's better to be honest about it up front.

I agree with PPs that you shouldn't be too worried about that. A date isn't owned by anyone, but it's very sweet of you to be concerned about your friend's feelings!