Is it awkward to invite co-workers and not their spouses?

I’m my circle very rude. Yes, you need to invite spouses as they are a social unit. If you don’t have the room, don’t invite them. Plus ones are for truly single guests and are different than spouses/partners/significant others who should be named on the invitation. If you are inviting friends and not their SO, I would skip the co-workers and invite your friends partners.


You’re asking them to come to your wedding. The event all about being a couple. Invite their SOs so they can be a couple at your wedding as well. A lot of people don’t like dancing with others SOs or dancing with single guests when they already have an SO. And being at a wedding is a romantic day/night for couples to bask in the lovey atmosphere to celebrate you both.

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Just to clarify, we are inviting our friend's SO's but only if we've been introduced. Most of my friends are in their own couples or we've met their SO and are already close. However, there are a few friends who we haven't met their SO or they just started dating so we aren't considering sending their SO's an invite.

I guess the main thing that's holding me up with the idea of allowing it neither I nor my fiance have met them, and some of their spouses I wouldn't even know the name of. Its a bit strange for me for both of us to be meeting someone on our wedding day if that makes any sense.

View Quoted Comment That makes total sense and I 100% know where you’re coming from. But… it is considered rude to invite people without their spouse or significant other, EVEN if you never met them. If I were you I would consider eliminating coworkers all together, that way, you can invite the significant others of your other friends who you were originally not going to invite. If you don’t know their names, reach out to the friend and get the name. Sorry to sound Frank but so many people ask the same question (myself included when I was planning my wedding). Good luck in whatever you decide!

You have to invite spouses. It's considered very insulting not to. I'd cut out the coworkers

Yes it's rude. Regardless of if you have met someone's significant other their significant should be invited. You are asking them to come celebrate your relationship but you want to disregard their relationship. If my husband wasn't invited to a wedding and I was I wouldn't attend.

Since you still have a year before sending out invitations, as far a budget is concerned, I would factor everyone coming with a SO (people who are single now may be in a relationship in a few months). As pp's have said, it doesn't matter if you've never met them. What matters is that they're important to the guest you are inviting (who may decline if they cannot bring someone to dance with, etc.).

"Is my spouse invited?" You don't want to have those awkward conversations at work especially if the answer is no. Your wedding should also not be a work topic if not all colleagues are invited. Do all couples, or nothing and request everyone keep it quiet by never bringing it up. You don't want to look wedding silly, ill-mannered, or exclusionist in your career.

This would be extremely rude. Doesn't matter if you've met the partners before or not. A spouse is a spouse and you can't invite only one half of a couple. We had a number of partners/spouses that we didn't meet until our wedding and it was no big deal. A brand new boyfriend or girlfriend who someone has only just started dating is one thing, but a spouse is non-negotiable

People who just started dating? Yeah you can get away with cutting plus ones. Long-term SOs, fiancé(e)s, or spouses? Nope. Not even if you’ve never met them. We had never met one of our groomsman’s fiancée because they had been so busy, but that really didn’t matter on our wedding day. We were happy to finally be meeting her.


After questionable family members that have been abusive (that’s also a category couples have asked about on here), honestly coworkers should be the next circle that couples consider cutting when needing to trim guest lists. Work is a special situation in which if something gets weird, it’s hard to come back from. If there’s a tiff with a friend or extended family member over wedding matters, you can just keep distance after. With work, you can’t unless one or the other quits and gets a new job or moves departments. Also only inviting certain coworkers but not others can lead to weird feelings within the team or department and make small-talking about your wedding during the planning phase awkward as you’re trying to preserve the uninvited people’s feelings. I’d highly suggest cutting the coworkers to make room for those other friends’ SOs you haven’t met yet. Most coworkers understand not being invited these days due to weddings being so expensive now and more couples financing them independently.

It’s always the height of impolite to invite one half of a couple, regardless if you have met the partner or not. The only time when it is acceptable to not invite the partner is when they are toxic(racist/abusive/homophobic/violent/criminal). Not knowing them is not an excuse because it takes 5 minutes on Zoom call, for example, to be introduced. A wedding is the celebration of relationships and it’s very disrespectful to guests to tell them “come celebrate our relationship while we choose to not acknowledge yours”. The significant other has the right to decline if they choose but it is never your place to decide for them that theirs is not valid, regardless of how long they have been together, whether you have met them, or who the invited guest is to you. If you have no intention of not inviting the significant other, don’t invite the one you know.


At the same time, it’s never required to invite coworkers because very few people socialize in their own homes after hours with coworkers.

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Wedding practices, traditions and etiquette differs significantly across the globe and different cultures but one of the most universally accepted unwritten rules of etiquette is that it is rude to invite one half of a couple, regardless if they are close friends or colleagues, have or have not been introduced to you etc.

If you have friends who have just started seeing people, you may be able to get away with not inviting the significant other by reason of them just casually dating, but bear in mind that a lot can change between now and April 2024.

I completely understand trying to keep within your budget by cutting plus ones but I definitely don't think you can do that with married couples. I d strongly suggest trying not to leave out any long term partners when possible. It's kinda like saying come celebrate my marriage/relationship while I completely disregard yours. People are likely to get offended. I agree with others I d probably just eliminate all co-workers. Best of luck to you!

I was invited alone to two weddings with my now fiancé when we had already been dating for 7 years and people knew we were getting engaged soon. I was not at all offended! I was honored to be invited and I went and celebrated their love. Weddings are so expensive and take a lot of time and effort to set up. We are not giving everyone a plus one (if I’ve never met their boyfriend/girlfriend I consider them a play one), especially if we have a big group of mutual friends they will sit with. I would hope my friends would rather be invited to celebrate with me and our friends than not invited at all