Is it a wedding or a vow renewal?

A lot of people on here may get fired up and tell you it isn’t a wedding, but I disagree.

I’m in a similar boat, where my partner and I have a domestic partnership (which is a marriage legally in everything but name here in California), which we honestly did for healthcare—we know we won’t be able to afford the big wedding that we want and our families expect for a while, but we’ve lived together for five years at this point and it just doesn’t make sense for us not to be able to share benefits, access each other in a medical emergency, etc.

Marriage is so much more than just shared health insurance or joint taxes, and to boil it down to that and say you can’t have a wedding because of it is silly. If you all already planned to get married, it just makes good sense to take advantage of those legal benefits as soon as you can and still wait until you can afford the wedding you want.

I’m getting married in Vegas in January and having a “wedding” in September. I think you can call it whatever you want. Best Wishes!!

Honestly I think you can call it whatever you want. I don’t think people should worry about that. It’s a special day for the two of you and how long you’ve been together shouldn’t matter.

My FH and I actually went to the courthouse with our parents last Nov. and will be having our "wedding" this Nov, which is technically a vow renewal. We are still calling it a wedding though because not all of our friends know we are technically married, but for us and our family it is our 1 year vow renewal. You can call it whatever you want, it's your day!

I think given that you’ve not previously had a wedding or said vows to each other, then it’s a wedding, regardless of whether the state treats you as already married.

View Quoted Comment Yes I agree with this! In general if you’re “already married” I think it’s a vow renewal, but since you didn’t even really “get” married, you were just recognized as such by the state, I think it’s fine to call it your wedding!

I agree that if you're already legally married, it would be a vow renewal

Common law isn’t the same thing as being legally married. Yes, in your state it’s recognized as such, but if you chose to move to a state that doesn’t recognize common law (the majority of states don’t), you wouldn’t be married. I think you can have a celebration and call it a wedding next year. Do you plan to be legally married at that time?

View Quoted Comment Yes that is the plan

View Quoted Comment Definitely call it a wedding then!