Inviting some cousins but not others?

If you don't know them, it wouldn't be that awful. I didn't invite all of my cousins either, but I did invite them in aunt/uncle family groups like your description.

ETA: At first I felt really weird about my decision. Then one of my cousins posted on facebook that her wedding invitations were in the mail, and I realized she never asked me for my address: that told me she didn't invite me to her wedding either.

I'm not inviting an Aunt, nor any of her 3 adult children. I'm just not close with them, nor have I seen or heard from them in many years. On the other hand my twin brother (who's also getting married this year) is inviting them to his wedding, as he is closer to one of our cousins. I don't feel bad about not inviting them... I personally didn't inviting anyone who I haven't seen/spoke to in the past 5 years because I probably won't be seeing/ speaking to them in the following 5 years.

I don't think it would be that awful at all. If you wouldn't recognize them if they passed you in the street, then you certainly won't recognize them at the wedding. If they got an invitation from you, they'd probably say, "who?"

One of my mother's brother's has SIXTEEN family members all on his own and I'm not that close to them; I plan on inviting just the first cousins. Three of them have 2-3 children between them and one of those children has a young child. It's just too much.

Well, I chose not to invite all my cousins because I have over 100 first cousins alone and we wanted a tiny wedding. I ended up only inviting 1, the only one I talk to even somewhat regularly. My DH invited all his first cousins (because there were only 2) except for those that were under 18 (a set of 3 rowdy 8-16 year old boys who would have hated it anyhow, they always spend weddings playing on their phones). In your situation I personally don't see anything super wrong with it so long as you don't think it will cause any big family drama. If you think family will pitch a fit and you have spare room anyhow then I might just do it to keep the peace (and they likely won't come anyhow). But if you think so one will really care then I would just do as you please. Honestly, if anyone does say anything you could always be honest and say it was at your mothers suggestion as they are her family.

We invited our 1st cousins, who were over 21, but not the 2 who were under. I think they were 15 and 12, at the time of our wedding; I wouldn't know who they were, if I saw them, either.

We also didn't invite one uncle/aunt, per side. My MIL didn't supply the name/address of hubby's uncle - I don't think he communicates with the family, and on my side, my parent's don't have their address, or even exchange Xmas cards with them, so why bother?

My grandmother sent me a couple of nasty e-mails, demanding I invite my uncle's family, but my father had already explained to her multiple times that they weren't. She wanted an excuse to see them, because they only visit her if she pays for them to go to a resort near her, for their vacation. (Not kidding). It happened to be the week the RSVPs were due and of course, we didn't have any invitations, anyway, not that we'd consider it. That grandmother was the first to leave our reception - didn't care one bit.

If you don't really know them it wouldn't be bad if you didn't invite them and honestly I would hope they wouldn't even expect an invite

If you don't know them, why invite them?

I'll be inviting my cousins on my dad's side, but not on my mom's side. I haven't seen my mom's brother's kids since my mom's funeral in 2003. So, yeah. Not inviting them.

I don't think there is anything wrong with not inviting cousins, or other family members, that you don't know at all.

I'm inviting cousins I speak to and like. Others that I barely know and don't interact with, nope. Just because they are, "cousins" doesn't get them an automatic invitation.

We're inviting our aunts and uncles, but I'm not inviting all of my cousins. Only the few that I know. I don't think it's terrible, to me it would be weird if cousins I never ever associated with would expect a wedding invite all of the sudden JUST because they're my cousins.

Thank you so much y'all! I feel a ton better!

My family is pretty small, so I feel like I should be inviting everyone, but I really don't know them. I know great aunts and second cousins better than these particular first cousins.

It won't cause any family drama if they're not invited, so I'm gonna go with it!

Don't be concerned. I have aunts and cousins I am not inviting.

I know this wedding is long over by now but my answer is it would be HORRIBLE to invite all cousins but 1 family's kids. Do you now how hurt I would be if a cousin did that and I would turn it inward on myself to avoid rejection. My cousin did this when she got married. She had my siblings and I and she had my aunt and her children as well as my one uncle and his son (his only child) but she did not have my uncle's children. She had the uncle and his wife but not their children. I get that she is not that close to his children but do you know how segregated from the family they must have felt. I was ashamed of her. This was in 2012 and I still remember it and I don't recall the uncle's children saying anymore other then a cordial hello at our grandmother's funeral 3 years later or the 1 wedding they saw her at 2 years ago. She is a very good person but she was VERY WRONG in this action as was her mother for allowing it.

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I know this wedding is long over by now but my answer is it would be HORRIBLE to invite all cousins but 1 family's kids. Do you now how hurt I would be if a cousin did that and I would turn it inward on myself to avoid rejection. My cousin did this when she got married. She had my siblings and I and she had my aunt and her children as well as my one uncle and his son (his only child) but she did not have my uncle's children. She had the uncle and his wife but not their children. I get that she is not that close to his children but do you know how segregated from the family they must have felt. I was ashamed of her. This was in 2012 and I still remember it and I don't recall the uncle's children saying anymore other then a cordial hello at our grandmother's funeral 3 years later or the 1 wedding they saw her at 2 years ago. She is a very good person but she was VERY WRONG in this action as was her mother for allowing it.

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Because they are family.

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Family is Forever. Friends come and go, Family is Eternal. If I got married all 1st cousins would be asked. All or none.

View Quoted Comment As a 1st cousin of the father of the groom and the ONLY cousin that wasn’t invited I can tell you it sucks! I grew up with these kids. To see my entire family there was horrible. Yes I live in AZ and the wedding was in WI but I know how to get on a plane. I had indicated to the mother of the bride that I missed the previous wedding sent a gift and I would make it to the next one. Jan is tough to fly from AZ. Anyhow I got on the uninvited list. So agree w Dylan!!!

View Quoted Comment Thank you Dylan for your reply. You can see me below. I am the oldest granddaughter and very close to my cousin. Grew up babysitting for him every family gathering etc. his wife and daughter did not extend to us an invitation when all of my cousins were invited. I live in another state do I guess that breaks the family ties. Anyhow thank you for your wonderful insight!

Sorry but you are burdening yourself with 2 invites that could mean your Aunty and uncle feel very uncomfortable.