Inviting people we barely know

I know what you are going through. My fiancé had a huge list . I had his parents go over it with him . They knocked it down to 23 people . He keeps trying to add people , but I keep telling him no and explaining to him that the church and venue can't accommodate everyone. I also remind him that extra people means extra money needed for catering . You definitely are not overreacting.

If invited by a coworker I don't socialize with outside of work, I wouldn't attend. I would probably feel they were just fishing for gifts. I have always felt weddings should be intimate affairs with family and friends you consider family.

I dont think you are wrong. They probably dont want to be invited anyways since they arent close to yall

It's the opposite for me and my fiancé, I have many people. But the issue I've run into after the engagement became fb official was all these people I don't talk to on a regular basis were like "I better get an invite!!" How do you say no without sounding rude?

I don't think you're overreacting. This is reasonable. FH needs to calm it down.

Tawna, I would do the number crunching but ultimately let people know that though you appreciate them wanting to be with you on your big day, that you want to keep it intimate with family and very close friends.

There's nothing wrong with inviting work people you don't socialize with outside of work, as long as you're BOTH okay with it. You're not, which is why this is a problem. But there isn't one rule that applies to everyone. Mary, I doubt they're fishing for gifts since many weddings, the couple pays the same or more for the guest to attend than the guest likely would for a gift (at least in my experience).

Wedding guests who are co-workers should be limited to those with whom you have a social relationship outside work. Is your FI afraid of offending someone, so his solution is to invite everyone?

@Tawna Just tell them that unfortunately you won't be able to include everyone with whom you would like to celebrate your wedding day.

Muriel, that's a pretty arbitrary rule.

@Tawna, NOOOOOO!!!! They'll be alright. I can see not being able to invite a good friend or someone you regularly socialize with because of proper hosting and limited guest list. But for those you don't really talk to, it's not rude to just say NO. OP, I don't think you're overreacting at all. Sorry, but everyone can't attend

Has he stated a want for an intimate wedding. An intimate wedding generally is 75 or less and at 104 and 44 you certainly are well over that. Maybe you can tell him flatly you are not comfortable with having people there that he never hangs out with or you haven't met. Ask him if he can come to a compromise and you guys have a list of 90 individuals and you get 45 each.

I'd be frustrated by that, too. I don't think there's any reason to invite randos like that...

I did the rule of 3 to start outside of family. Do i hang out or see them at atleast 3 diff places Work/ hang out outside of work/ school/ mutual friends. If you only have 1 connection then they arent that close unless family.

Definitely not overreacting, you want it to be with people that know you both and can celebrate this wonderful day with . It's not a meet & greet , it's your wedding .

The best piece of advice that I got and used for my guest list is if you went out to dinner with the person, would you cover their entire meal and drinks at a restaurant plus their spouse? If your answer is no, that says something so they don't get an invite

Don't invite people you don't know personally. It will take time away from those you actually really do care for.

Not to mention adding these people will add to catering. I do not know your budget or the style of your wedding but the catering will add up. Is that something he is okay with that, are you?

I read on here somewhere, Im not sure who said it but someone said 'would you be okay taking them to dinner and spending 50 on each one of them?' I found that genius. If this answer is no, do not invite them. This is what you are doing at the end of the day, your bringing them to dinner and paying for their entertainment.