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Just Said Yes April 2018

Inviting former co-workers

michellet, on June 28, 2017 at 12:05 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 9

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I'm torn on inviting former co-workers to my wedding. I worked there for several years and most of us were more like family. It's a department of about 13 people. Of these 13, seven I definitely want at my wedding, three I'm iffy on, and three I'd rather they not come. I don't think they actually show up since they didn't come to another co-workers wedding earlier this month, but I don't really want to risk it. Do I need to invite everyone from the department? Also, I'm concerned because the venue is pretty small, about 100 seats, so I don't really have any extra space.

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9 Comments

Latest activity by augustlawbride, on June 28, 2017 at 6:54 PM

Super July 2017
MrsMet · on June 28, 2017 at 12:08 PM
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Agree with Kate. Just invite the ones you want to be there and still have a relationship with.
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Savvy August 2018
Shelby · on June 28, 2017 at 12:15 PM
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I will have the same situation. I'm inviting 4 people from my previous company and ignoring the others. They are not a part of my daily life anymore, but the 4 have kept in touch and mean a lot to me.
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Master July 2017
StPaulGal · on June 28, 2017 at 12:17 PM
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Definitely just invite the ones you want. You don't work there anymore--no obligation to invite the ones you don't even like.

I have an awkward former coworker invite situation myself. I changed jobs a couple of weeks ago, after the invitations had already gone out. Only one former coworker so far has RSVPd at all, and she was a no. Now I am faced with the awkward task of following up with these people if they don't send their cards by this weekend. Ugg.
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Super January 2019
FutureMrs · on June 28, 2017 at 12:17 PM
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Invite who you want there to celebrate your day!
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July 1993
WED18 · on June 28, 2017 at 12:19 PM
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Did you socialize with them outside of work before or since you left the company? If not, I wouldn't invite them. If you're still close to a few, then only invite them.
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VIP September 2017
Sos0033 · on June 28, 2017 at 12:35 PM
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Invite the 7.
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Just Said Yes April 2018
michellet · on June 28, 2017 at 12:37 PM
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Thanks y'all. This was causing me a lot of stress. I didn't want there to be any bad feelings since I go back there to visit sometimes.
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Celia Milton · on June 28, 2017 at 5:25 PM
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I wouldn't invite any of them, honestly. As Lilly (I believe) put this so succinctly in another thread, this is an event to share with your nearest and dearest. Not your ex-coworkers, not your grade school friends you haven't seen in years, not your parent's colleagues.

And don't forget, the seven, with SO's will become 14. That seems like a lot in a venue that seats 100.
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Expert August 2017
augustlawbride · on June 28, 2017 at 6:54 PM
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If there are folks your still friends with then invite those and only those.

One of my best friends I met at a former workplace, but now I'd think of her as a friend who happens to be a former co-worker and not the other way around. I'd limit it to those you still see/consider friends, if any.

ETA: And the good news is you're no longer there, so if the other get mad or upset you don't have to see/deal with them
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