Invite only ceremony advice

Tiered weddings are super rude. I would avoid this plan at all costs--you would probably end up offending a lot of people

I have to agree with PPs. I would have no problem with a Reception only invitation if the ceremony is small and intimate with close friends and family only. Then, everyone at the reception is in the same situation and didn't attend the ceremony. But when the majority of guests at the reception attended the ceremony and I didn't, I going to be upset that I wasn't included in all aspects of your special day. I'd be offended and wouldn't look favorably on our relationship any longer.

I suggest cutting the reception guest list to 130, as well. As someone else said, not being invited is preferable to only being invited to part of the day.

View Quoted Comment Inviting a limited number of people to the ceremony, particularly a religious one, and an additional group plus all those at the ceremony, for a meal and dancing, has long been acceptable when they are at separate locations, as in a religious house of worship or other meaningful place, or a civil one, such as a Judges Chambers. Then all those people relocate to where the reception is and all attend the social gathering, meal, and after meal portions, along with additional people at social hour, meal, and after meal portions . And with a very large family, 100 people may be most immediate family at the ceremony, and extended family plus friends at the full reception including at the meal.
But not acceptable, I agree, is the tiered wedding, all held at the same venue, but only some to the seating area for the ceremony, Or having some people at the meal, and others not arrive to the same venue until the meal has been served to some then cleared away. Anyone invited to that location should have the same, full experience. So if you want to have an earlier ceremony someplace else, okay. But same venue, some excluded, no. Not at all polite.

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Hannah isn't the odd one out here. I agree with everything she said. In the U.S., this is considered very rude--to exclude some of your guests from the ceremony. For space? Nope. I would either choose a venue that can hold everyone I have on my guest list, or I would trim the guest list so that ALL of my guests could attend the entire thing. For me, the ceremony is the part I really want to see--people who love each other exchanging vows. The rest is just a party.

Unless your ceremony is immediate family only, 20 guests or fewer, then this is rude and offensive to the guests excluded from your ceremony. Nobody wants to find out that they're not in the top 130/200 guests invited to your wedding. Don't tier your guests like that - everyone should be treated equally.

I originally planned a small ceremony on the beach and a reception later. I was going to have a main invite that said Please join us to celebrate the marriage of xxx. But it was much smaller. For you I think I’d in it less. It would hate to find out only a handful of people including me didn’t get invited to ceremony. But honestly lots of people skip ceremony if there’s a big gap in time between.

Don't do this. Only invite people whom you want to attend both events. They are not separate. People will be offended and likely not show up.