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Savvy June 2021

Invite her or not?

Shaunna, on May 28, 2019 at 2:47 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 6

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Hi,
So I am having a bit of dilemma with my wedding guest list. Years ago I was really good friends with this girl and her sister. Life happened, we got busy, and drifted apart, but never on bad terms. Now, I occassionally talk to the sister and even when I bump into them both we always hug and do a quick few minute catch up and then part ways.

My dilemma....
I planned on inviting both of them. Reason being, I would feel bad inviting one without the other and I dont want any hurt feelings or awkwardness when we bump into each other after the wedding. 2 people (who are part of the bridal party), dont want me inviting one of them (because of past drama) and is making a big deal out of it. So now I dont know what to do because I want to please everyone, but I dont want to deal with any drama. I am basically in "the wrong" either way I go.

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6 Comments

Latest activity by Shaunna, on May 29, 2019 at 12:52 PM

Legend November 2019
Caytlyn · on May 28, 2019 at 2:55 PM
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You invite who you want to invite. Their drama is none of your business and has no place at your wedding. Your adult friends should know that. You control your guest list, not your bridesmaids.
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Master May 2021
Cristy · on May 28, 2019 at 3:00 PM
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Totally agree with Caytlyn here. It's nobody's business but yours and FHs who you invite to YOUR wedding.
I would tell these people in your bridal party exactly that. You'll invite whoever you want, and if they can't get past it, they don't have to attend.
It's really rude of them to even presume to think they can tell you who to invite or not invite. They aren't being good friends. The only people you have to please is yourself and FH.
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Master September 2019
Mrs. H · on May 28, 2019 at 3:07 PM
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Ignore your bridesmaid. She can grow up for a day and put her "past drama" aside for you. If you want to invite them both, do it. If you want to invite just one, go for it. You haven't talked to either of them much in the past couple of years from the sounds of it, so honestly it wouldn't be a big deal if you ended up not inviting either of them. For example, FH and I cut our guest list by eliminating people we haven't spoken to in over a year
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Master December 2019
Cher Horowitz · on May 28, 2019 at 3:49 PM
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It's your wedding, not your bridesmaid's! Surely your BM can put aside her differences for your special day. Invite who you want to invite!
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VIP June 2019
MIWM · on May 28, 2019 at 9:53 PM
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You invite whoever you want. It's your day!
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Savvy June 2021
Shaunna · on May 29, 2019 at 12:52 PM
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Thank you everyone. I know that's what I should do and it doesnt help that I'm such a people pleaser lol
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