Invitations question

How does your fiancé feel about it? Does he think it will upset his parents?
Otherwise you could also call your future MIL and see how she reacts to it. Some people get offended by this very quickly, while others don’t care. I’d test the water before paying for new invites ☺️

View Quoted Comment Well he wasn’t worried about it but he spoke to his mom and she said he was ok but he told me that he could tell that they would have liked to have had their names on it as well. I wish we had just put something like “Together with their families”. My mom certainly wasn’t trying to hurt feelings, she thought she was doing it the correct way which traditionally she did.

If it's not too much money, get them redone to say "Together with their parents" instead of your parents' names only.

View Quoted Comment That’s probably what I’ll do. It still irritates me because they aren’t really involved in the wedding in anyway besides attending and putting in their opinions. My family is literally doing it all. Which I know is traditional which is why my mom did the invitations traditionally. Oh well.

Imo the grooms family name shouldn't be on it. So I wouldn't feel bad or reorder anything. FMIL will get over it

View Quoted Comment Well they did supply the groom for the wedding....

View Quoted Comment Lol good point girl!!

View Quoted Comment Oh ok. After reading a few more comments - I agree with Shirley. Save your money and the trees 😂

View Quoted Comment

Very few people follow tradition anymore. Currently, most couples host the wedding themselves without parental assistance. Do what works for you.

I’d leave it and move on. They’re not hosting and it’s not that big of a deal.
If she says anything just tell her your mom did them and you didn’t have any input.

They set the expectations when they let your parents pay for the entire wedding due to “tradition”. The invitations are addressed correctly as per that precedent - your parents are hosting the wedding and his are not.
Don’t change the invites, it’s a waste of time and money as well as insulting to your family who followed etiquette.

Personally, I wouldn’t change the invitations. They’re not contributing financially to the wedding so they don’t get listed. My fiancé & I are paying for everything so parents aren’t listed. His mother tried to control the guest (she didn’t want to invite her sister) but he told her that was not a decision that she gets to make.

I get where she's coming from, but if I were in her shoes my son is getting married and the brides parents are paying for everything and I don't need to worry about anything financially, all I need to do is be there for the event and support the couple. I think she's getting a pretty good deal and she should be more understanding and let it go. If she had wanted her name to be part of the host on the invitation, she should have offered to pay for something.

If they want people to think they are hosting, they should host.

View Quoted Comment Agreed! Don't change your invitations. Your parents are generously hosting. It is so rude that his parents want y'all to reprint and pay again for new invitations when there is absolutely nothing wrong with the invitation wording. If they foot the bill, they are the hosts. It is as simple as that.

I wouldn't change your invitations. Your parents are the ones hosting. If your in-laws want their names on the invitations, then time to pay up $$$ and help finance the wedding.

I wouldn’t have them redone. If your future in-laws want their names on the invitations, they can help pay for them. Your mother is in the right here.

Ours have that wording but my parents are paying for the bulk of our wedding. My mother asked me how I wanted to word it on the invitations. When I told her I hadn’t given it much thought she mentioned that and again asked me if they could have their names and FH and I agreed and that’s how they are. Not sure if my mil knows this since she hasn’t seen them yet, but at the end of the day my parents have been so supportive financially and emotionally with our wedding asking us stuff instead of demanding unlike my mil who twice now has thrown a fit over a disagreement about the guest list and threatened us she wouldn’t come instead of asking us. My in laws helped us w down payment for the photographer and are hosting the rehearsal but in the grander scheme of things my parents are hosting. At the end of the day if she’s mad about it idc and I’m not showing her before they come out bc I’m not dealing with the backlash if she is upset (she may not be) but my situation is different. If you are concerned have FH talk w his mom but personally if your parents are hosting there is nothing wrong with the wording. Esp since this is traditionally what you do when one set of parents are hosting

View Quoted Comment Good point .This is the reason why we are paying for everything, including the reharsal diner, this was the 1st decison we made after I told her about all these drama and "horror stories" I read on a "weddingwebsite forum" LOL.
So our parents don't get any say, not even on her dress or the wedding party (I'm a groom and I wanna ask my sisters to be in it, no one else ( best woman and groomswoman), she wants a brother as her MOH and their parents would make it impossible if they got a say).
I noticed that you Fiancé put his mother in her place: GREAT NEWS! Because from what I read on WW, most grooms and a large amount of brides let their mom and future mother in-law win all battles and don't even want to fight them! Even when they are paying for everything.At least I'm not alone on this.