Invitation Wording

My wedding was paid for by my parents as well and our invitations were worded like the second way. I think it's actually the pretty common wording for that situation, and I very much doubt it's the first time your FMIL has ever seen an invitation worded like that.

If you wanted, you could try something like "Mr. and Mrs. Bride's Parents invite you to the wedding of OP's Name and FH's name" so that it can somewhat appease your FMIL.

However, please talk with your FH about her behavior now and setting boundaries and what that means for your future together. I'm not trying to be alarmist or anything like that, but the fact that she is threatening to send out her own invitations because she probably doesn't like that it's publicly being acknowledged that she's not contributing to your wedding (which is the language the 2nd wording conveys) is not good and it's behavior that needs to be shut down.

Mr & Mrs your parents along with Mr & Mrs his parents invite you to celebrate the marriage of you and FH names. This is the only other thing I can think of lol. List their names first then you and FH then date and times and place. My parents and grandparents are helping pay but they both said they dont really care to be recognized so I didnt have to go through this.

My parents and myself/FH are paying for about 95% of the wedding combined. We decided to just stick with tradition and have "Mr. and Mrs. Her Parents invites you to celebrate the marriage of their daughter _____ to ________". In the end I knew it would make my parents happy and honestly, I doubt many people pay THAT close attention to the wording at the front. I didn't care how it was worded so I just decided to go traditional on it.

But isn't that exactly what's happening? If your parents are paying for it, they are hosting it. It sucks that she's acting the way she is. It's not like this has never happened before.. I agree with PPs that your FH should talk with her about how it is a wedding for the TWO of you, not just you and your family. I would not be happy if I found out someone sent out their own invites for something I / my FH and I / my parents were hosting.

But that's exactly what's happening. If they have a problem with it then they need to contribute to the wedding or they need to be quiet and deal with it.

I don't mean to sound so harsh, the internet can be terrible for that sometimes. I just can't believe that your FMIL would have the gall to threaten to send her own invitations when the wording of the invitation is incredibly common and not at all unusual for these circumstances and it's making me irrationally angry.

It might be because I'm 8 months pregnant and tired and hot and my own MIL acted terribly at my sprinkle this past weekend that I'm a little sensitive to your post, so I am sorry if I am coming off more harsh than I mean.

I hope you can get all of this figured out in a way that doesn't cause too much stress for you.

Yikes! If your parents are paying, technically the second way is "correct". There are plenty of websites out there that will back you up on this, have you shown your FMIL any? This might help her see that it's completely normal wording, and not just a dig at them:

https://www.theknot.com/content/standard-wedding-invitation-wording-examples

I will also add that most guests won't pay much attention to the exact wording!

The second wording is correct. They are paying, therefore they are hosting the event. The second is the traditional option that has been used for years, because traditionally the bride's parents paid for the wedding. I really would never allow FMIL to send out separate invites. That's tacky and lying. If they feel bad, they could've offered to pay some! And your original wording would've been correct. I hope you can get this resolved and I think your FH should help out in explaining to your mom how the etiquette is. Normally, I say screw it to etiquette but this one is a pretty given.

My parents feel the same way yours do and we are going with the second wording. Truthfully, we aren't asking how FH's parents feel about it because my parents are hosting 100% so it is up to them. It sounds like she wants her friends and family to think they contributed when they didn't. And I'm not criticizing the fact that they didn't contribute at all, but she can't have her cake and eat it too.

Are your FIL's hosting the RD maybe where they could have that kind of wording the other way around and maybe she would feel better? My FFIL is hosting our RD so he will get to decide on the invitation wording.

Either of those could work as PP have said. On our invites we did Mr.____ (my dad is divorced and I have no relationship with my mom so she wont be there) and Mr and Mrs____ (FH parents) request the pleasure of your company at the marriage of and then listed our names and the details for the wedding. This way both parents are listed.

The second option is traditional, so I'd just go with that.