Invitation Feedback/etiquette

I think it's a very clear way to do it - I also went with something to the effect of like X seats reserved for you and they fill in X # attending due to fears of miscommunication about RSVPs. You're probably going to get the people on the site saying don't send more than 4-6 weeks out, etc. etc. I guess that's a standard somewhere?

But if you need the count firm by June 9 and want to give yourself a 2 week buffer to reach people (who might be out that holiday weekend) - I agree!

View Quoted Comment Is it bad etiquette to put seats reserved? Did you have any complaints?

View Quoted Comment

I put it on mine and no one complain. Our venue holds only 50 people. I wanted people to know how many were invited so they didnt feel the need to invite anyone else. Plus it won't be such a shocker when they realize they see how many seats are reserved for them. Just makes sense to me.

We're also putting "____ seats reserved" on our RSVPs. According to my FMIL, it is not uncommon for my FH's side of the family to bring everyone and the family pet to events, regardless to whom the invitation is addressed. I want to make it very clear about how many people are being invited.

View Quoted Comment Same here. Have you also recruited your FMIL in the effort? I basically split up our list based on who prepare for the different guests - Sola fide get an invite back from one of her sisters where they have scratched out the number of seats and put five, that's for my mother-in-law to deal with.


It may help take the pressure off of you and feel like you have backup.

View Quoted Comment I haven’t. I’m very comfortable calling people out if there’s an issue with numbers on the RSVP, so I don’t mind making those calls. I’m more concerned about the warning that his side of the family doesn’t always RSVP and “that’s the way we Mexicans do it”. 😂 I responded with, “well, unfortunately there won’t be seating or food for anyone who doesn’t respond” and plan on having quite a few people to call after the RSVP deadline.

Ours was something like


__ accepts __ regrets__ of _#_ attending (we filled in the second number)
This worked well for us— people checked next to coming or not, then put the total number of those attending, it seemed simple and straight forward, which was good bc I’ve seen that some people can be really terrible at rsvping, haha. We didn’t have any issues this way. I’ve also seen “_ number of seats reserved” and have never felt bothered by it