Interacting with people who aren't invited

I just changed the conversation. Unfortunately, if they aren't invited, they aren't invited. It's nothing you can do about it.

If they ask just say you're having a small wedding just close family and friends.

I totally feel you, it can get really awkward... My way has sort of just been not mentioning the invitation issue. So if they ask about the wedding I just say something like "yeah, we're really excited about it!" So that it doesn't invite a ton of details.

Don't talk about your wedding to them. Or if they ask about it just answer nonchalantly and then change the subject.

I would just say 'I know, it really stinks! We had such a small budget and our families are so big that we couldn't invite nearly everyone we wanted. It took me forever to finalize our list.'

Just change the conversation. I'm a people pleaser too and straight up someone asked me at work, "Am I invited to your wedding?" The rational side of me wanted to say, "No sorry," and the people pleaser in me wanted to say, "Sure, I guess so, we get along at work!" Instead I settled for, "Uhhhhh did you want to come?" Trust me when I say, the conversation that followed a week later was a hell of a lot more awkward than just being straight up with them in the first place.

If they press you for an invite, you can say, "I'm sorry, due to venue (or budget) restrictions, we really had to limit our guest list."

I get told all the time by people who I don't even plan on inviting (it's a ways away) to let them know or to please ask them if I need any help with anything for the wedding. I tell them thanks but it shouldn't be too hard since it might just be a small, nothing to fuss over thing. What my reaction will be to them if they see that I actually threw a pretty big "thing" is a different story, though.

I've seen it suggested to use venue restrictions as the reasoning instead of budget. I've heard stories of guests offering to pay for their own plate.

Having this problem currently as well. In the end it has to be the day you and your FH want and envision! I've sort of stuck to "we are keeping it intimate with family and a few close friends." I don't even bring up wedding details at work, although I've had a few people ask me if they are invited too. :/

" One of the hardest things about planning our wedding is that we won't be able to invite everyone with whom we would like to celebrate. I'm sure you understand."