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Just Said Yes April 2016

Informal, Not-hosted Rehearsal dinner?

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April, on January 29, 2016 at 1:30 PM

FH and I are paying for our wedding mostly ourselves, with the exception of my parents paying for the catering. His family has said they cannot/will not contribute financially. That being said, with the rehearsal dinner typically put on by the Groom's family, and our lack of funds to pay for another...

I was thinking that we would let everyone know ahead of time that it is not hosted, and I would get a head count and reserve a large table at a restaurant. I see it more as an invitation to come out and meet us for dinner after the rehearsal, and would invite some out-of-town guests to join as well (probably no more than 20 people total).

Money saving strategy or rude and inappropriate?

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27 Comments

VIP May 2016
MrsMcDougall · on January 29, 2016 at 2:47 PM
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+1 for Pizza. That's what my mom did for her wedding. I'm having a taco bar or taking our BP to a restaurant to keep costs down for mine.
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Celia Milton · on January 29, 2016 at 2:52 PM
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There is nothing 'typical' about who pays for what anymore. Almost no one needs a rehearsal any more, but if you do one, you need to provide dinner, even a very casual one (which is, in my mind, completely better than a big formal thing). One of my all time faves was a destination wedding rehearsal at a quirky pool hall with appetizers, pizza and beer. It was great.

I'd bag the rehearsal. Unless your venue coordinator is a complete neophyte and your officiant is doing their first wedding, they can line you up and people can walk out in some semblance of order. It's really an not that hard. We generally do a run through on the day of the wedding. It works out fine.
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Master November 2015
Rebecca · on January 29, 2016 at 3:03 PM
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Way to take advice well, April my husband's parents are both deceased so we hosted our own rehearsal dinner. We didn't do any toasts, just told people the info and had a meal and wine. I'm a huge fan of gourmet pizza and beer rehearsal dinners - they're delicious and inexpensive.
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VIP September 2015
Jeleebeenz · on January 29, 2016 at 3:13 PM
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If you have a rehearsal you need to feed these people and thank them. If you can't afford it just skip the rehearsal and problem solved.
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Master April 2017
MeetTheHamiltons · on January 29, 2016 at 3:17 PM
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We are funding our own wedding as well. I've been looking into cheap options for a rehearsal dinner, I've found that Bertucci's has a nice private room and their party menu is very affordable, $15 pp.
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Nancy Taussig · on January 30, 2016 at 11:14 AM
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If you must have a rehearsal, do a rehearsal lunch instead of rehearsal dinner -- that should be less expensive. If you do it before the rehearsal, people will have less time to drink & run up the bill.
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Master July 2015
annakay511 · on January 30, 2016 at 11:54 AM
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No, its rude. I would suggest just don't have a rehearsal -- then the RD is not necessary. If you really need a rehearsal, order a bunch of pizzas, make a big salad, and buy some 2-liters of soda. A RD does not need to be fancy!
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