Including a deceased father on invites

Son of mom's name and the late dad's name?

I'm so sorry for your loss. My mother passed away a few years ago so I know how difficult it can be. If you want to list him as a host I think that would be a very tasteful way to include him on the invites. There's no need to note that he's passed away, just his name as you would if he were still here. It's a very lovely sentiment.

I'm not sure about proper etiquette but I did Iook into this myself and it seemed like the only way to not make it seem like my deceased parents were inviting people was to phrase it something like The honor of your presence is requested at the wedding of

Susy Q daughter of the late Joe & lulu shmo to Charlie brown son of Mr. and Mrs Brown. If that makes any sense at all

Edit: I guess something like this switched around since it is your FH's, not your dad, my mistake

After your fh's name "son of (Mom's name) and the late (Dad's name)"

You don't include deceased people on an invite. The only people listed on the invites are the bride and groom, and whomever is hosting. The hosts being the people who are accepting the RSVPs, directing people at the wedding, and overall paying for the event.

If you want to include your father, you may include him in the programme.

I do understand, my father is deceased too, it's just against etiquette to put someone who is not hosting on the invite.

The proper etiquette is not to include the deceased on invites. As Emily Post says, "the dead can't host parties."

We are dealing with this with my FH, as his mom passed away a few years ago. We are including her in the programs, as well as dedicating the candle in the church to her memory. My FH doesn't want her absence front and center, but I also want to be sure to honor her. I also know if would hurt his feelings if someone assumed his step mom was his mom, so I wanted to make it clear.

I am sorry for your Fi's loss. I understand that this must be very hard on him without his father. However, an invitation is not a formal announcement of the wedding. It is to give logistics to guests.

Yes, it is written in formal language, but it doesn't change the meaning of it. Including a deceased parent on an invitation is like saying after 'Robert' passed away: 'Robert and I would like to have you over for dinner'. It's macabre and unsettling.

Take out a newspaper annoucement, there you can say 'John Smith, Son of Jane Smith and the late Robert Smith'.

You could also use 'Together with their families' which is much more neutral and inclusive.

My mom really wanted to include my late father's name on the invites (and she was paying for them), so here's how we are wording it.

Together with their families

Alison MiddleName LastName

daughter of Mrs. Mom's Name and the late Dad's Name

and FH full name

son of Mr. and Mrs. Parent Names. . .

This way it's not like they're hosting, but their name is on the invite.

FH's mom passes away almost 3 years ago, since she was always so vocal about her desire to see us getting married, we wanted to include her in our wedding, so we're using this for the invitation: we'll have our parents names written on the top corners in smaller print and next to her name there will be a small cross, yet the wording will be so it shows the both of us are hosting (similar to what @Alison wrote), this is a usual way of including a deceased parent in our country

I just did "Together with their parents" because I couldn't think of a way to put my mom's name on there without it saying "the late." I reeeally didn't want to put that on my invitation because it's still kind of fresh.

I have done many requests as Alison has listed her verse above. It is acceptable to list yourself as daughter of MOB and the late FOB.