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Beginner June 2021

I'm sad and stressed out and i hate the corona virus!!

Sara, on April 25, 2020 at 2:34 PM Posted in Community Conversations 0 7

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My wedding is September 3, 2020. i'm aware that its still a little further out than other weddings being affected right now, but I'm just as stressed! Long story short... we basically have 2 weeks to decide whether we want to postpone our wedding or not- and I'm not ready to make the decision right now! I actually feel very uncomfortable making that decision right now because there are so many different options of what could happen, and it's totally out of my control! Keep in mind, I wasn't planning to make any big changes like this until at least July, where it would be a lot closer to my date and hopefully have some clarity by then.

The reason why we have 2 weeks to make a decision is because our next payment is supposed to be due this upcoming Tuesday, but I expressed to them that I don't feel comfortable making payments right now that are non-refundable (especially a $4,000 one) and they said "we can extend it by 2 weeks"... Are they allowed to do this and request payment during this time!? Also, both my fiancé and I are out of work at the moment! I feel like thats not right and legally we shouldn't be obligated to make payments at the moment. I would feel a lot better if they were refundable, but they're not.

There's so many things that can happen that are out of my control, and I'm feeling defeated! Everyone keeps saying "It's not till September, it will all be fine by then" and yeah, that might end up being true! everything might be starting to open up by September, but what if there are state requirements/regulations regarding max capacities for gatherings, flights, everyone having to wear masks/gloves, venue no longer being able to provide plates/utensils, etc., and I want a normal wedding!!

we can either:

-keep everything as is, continue making payments to the venue (that are non-refundable) & hope its still happening on September 3rd.

-keep everything as is, but postpone to a later date. (which would most likely be a whole year because we don't want a winter wedding)

-cancel completely and figure something out later (and lose the money we've already paid the venue)

I'm so stressed about making a decision right now because of many reasons, but one reason being what if i were to postpone it, and then a month later everything is back to normal and i could've had my wedding as planned

Im sorry I just needed to vent and writing is my way of expression lol

I'm so so sorry to all of the other couples affected by this stupid corona virus!!!!

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7 Comments

Latest activity by Daniel, on April 26, 2020 at 6:20 AM

VIP September 2020
Neeva · on April 25, 2020 at 2:39 PM
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I think that given how stressed you are and that you are out of work, you should postpone the wedding for 2021. I wouldn't want to keep making payments or lose the money you've already put down if I were you.
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Savvy August 2020
Miluska · on April 25, 2020 at 2:48 PM
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I think because you want to have a normal wedding postponing to next year would probably be the best option. Even if some restrictions are lifted you may have guests worried about their health and there may be social distancing requirements that still need to be in place even with events being permitted. Also, things really won't be normal until there is a vaccine which is 12 to 18 months away at best. I have my wedding scheduled for Aug 23rd this year, and we discussed possibly eloping if there are still restrictions, mostly because my fiance would prefer not to postpone to another year. If you both are fine with postponing, that would be the safest choice and give you more flexibility to make the payments.
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Beginner September 2020
Emma · on April 25, 2020 at 3:41 PM
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Date twin! We are in the same boat. I feel so stressed about what to do. We have everything paid for and they will charge us a fee if we want to change the date.

We want to still get married on our date but I don't want to put all of my guests at risk, I would feel awful. So we can either pay our venue a date change fee so we can have a reception when it is safe and have a small ceremony at a park on our date, or we could just get married and do it all with less than 50 people at our venue.

I just don't know what to do with all of this uncertainty. What if our venue goes out of business by the time it is safe to have a reception and we lose all of that money? Is it a waste of money to have such a small guest list in a big building?
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Beginner September 2021
Tayler · on April 25, 2020 at 10:12 PM
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I’m September 6th and I feel this. I’m very much a planner and I don’t like making last minute decisions. We reached out to our venue a few weeks ago and they were only letting couples scheduled through the 1st week of June reschedule and keep their deposits. Which I totally understand, but I’m ready to just make the decision to postpone. It sucks, but I’d rather have peace of mind. Buuuuut we can’t do anything yet so it’s the waiting game. I want to reach out again but I don’t want to be annoying lol
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Devoted July 2020
Autumn · on April 26, 2020 at 1:03 AM
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I think it's obvious that having a "normal" wedding is your top priority so you should ask them to provide you with 2021 dates they have available for you do move the wedding to and make sure you can use any payments youve already made towards that date instead and cancel the September date.
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Devoted September 2021
Nikki · on April 26, 2020 at 2:09 AM
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September 20,2020 here sooooo....... My thoughts may be different then the rest as I see some are saying postpone, which since you are out of income I would just for that reason. My situation is a little different I'm still working one of my jobs my main job anyway and my FH is still working as well all deposits are paid but we don't have to pay a lot of stuff til the day of wedding so again I don't see how this helps you. I have one vendor due a month before hand and our hotels which is the resort we are having the wedding at to pay for a month before. As of right now I'm optimistic, it's still early and a lot of time we always hear about the bad right now but summer is approaching and most viruses can't survive in that weather. With that being said I am aware if we do not have the out come we would have had before this situation which is ok I wanted less people anyway my FH mom invited 1/3 of our list. All in all you have to stop living in fear and leave it in God's Hands if you are religious. And yes there may be a second wave but that could be in Oct /Nov. We don't know how this will go but also considering that studies are now questioning that this may have been here since last winter who's to say 2021 is so safe anyway. Yes I do believe there are a lot of brides postponing but I just figured I'll pay what I need to pay for and if I need to postpone I will do so accordingly when it get closer I'm giving myself til June so I'll know if this makes sense. I do apologize that your vendors are not understanding the situation at hand because you guys need your money and I'd talk to them to see if they will extend past the two weeks but chances are they are doing this because they are broke. You can always try to look for a different vendor that would understand but I can't imagine your original vendor would let you walk completely away paying what ever you have instead of being patient to get the rest of the payment. Best wishes to you and good luck. And I understand my statement may not be the best option or brides may attack me for it but everyone has a different situation and have to do what's best for their situation.
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Dedicated February 2024
Daniel · on April 26, 2020 at 6:20 AM
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Venting is fine it also helps you figure thing it. I would contact the venue and play worst case since they are non refundable what are they doing if still closed bring up your concerns to them and see how answer it and get it all in writing. Verbal is not as good and they can say you misunderstood what we saying. With all going on I can understand being stressed. I have had to redo 2 times and not sure yet I have 3 other dates set aside to see if happen. But when I signed I had all things in there from act of God weather plague Godzilla fire meteors and anything I could think of. When I did the place laughed at me and said don’t worry it will be fine we been doing this long time. Now see who laugh but I would wait the two weeks until almost last minute to decide what to do. I am sure open by then but I am not sure your finances with both out of work.
Be safe keep us posted
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