if you are a financial strapped groomsman are you required to buy a gift

He could get them something small. I usually say you shouldn't go into debt to get someone a gift. If they don't like what he gets, then that is on them. Being a GM is expensive.

Can he get them something small from their registry instead?

Even a card would be nice. I wouldn't have agreed to those boots though. The bride and groom should've asked his budget from the start. If he agreed to that then that's on him.

He could step down. And if the bride and groom are *requiring* cowboy boots, they should be paying for the groomsmen to have them.

We wouldn't expect any of our wedding party members to give us gifts. Putting up with all the stuff that comes along with being in a wedding is more than enough of a gift!

He might want to give a card with something nice written in it (we're making a book of all our cards). If the couple knows his kids well, maybe the little ones could draw something to go with the card?

A gift is NEVER required, and any friend worth having would much rather have his presence at their side than a gift. And I'm with Mrs. KK-- requiring the tux and boots seems extreme-- although I guess women are often required to buy shoes to go with an ugly BM dress. Is there anyone he could borrow a pair from (ditto the hat)?

Only two out of 11 people in our wedding party got us gifts and we totally understood. All of them spent $200-300 on attire and accommodations. I feel like if they are requiring him to get boots, they need to pay for it. I ride horses and know boots are EXPENSIVE. Maybe he can buy random cowboy boots off amazon or another store that aren't ACTUAL cowboy boots?

Zoe- My BM shoes were like $20 flats/pumps. Cowboy boots can run you a fortune.

Agree w/ @Alyssa. I would write a nice card and get something from $25-$50.00 off the registry. If not, maybe a $50.00 gift card to where they are registered, or to a restaurant they like.

Being in a wedding party isn't cheap. One of our groomsmen (my brother who doesn't have a lot of money) gave us a small gift and we didn't expect anything from him.

As a bride, I would not expect a gift from anyone.

As a bridal party member, I would do my best to get even just a small gift.

The bride/groom should have been the ones to purchase the cowboy boots if they were "requiring" him to wear them. IDK if it's tacky/terrible or what not, but if it were me I'd tell them I couldn't afford them.

Personally I wouldn't expect a thing from the adults in our wedding party (which is just a MOH and best man).

I don't think brides/grooms should expect anything from anyone.

But I would never go to a wedding empty handed. If he truly cannot even afford a small registry gift, then I would at least advise him to write a nice note in a nice card.

First of all, wedding gifts are never required from anyone. I would tell him to get a card and write a nice letter to the bride and groom sending them best wishes on their wedding day.

Thanks, this is helpful. I will talk to him about the responses here and let him decide.

A nice card with a thoughtful note would suffice. If he is struggling enough to ask your help on how to cut back I dont think his friends would miss the gift, whereas his pocket will miss that money.

If the bride request the boots then she should be paying and I am not expecting a gift from our bridal party considering they are already spending a lot of money on the dresses , tux my gift is them being apart of the wedding

I would just give a nicely written card and something small from the registry-like $20 small. Gifts are never required, but that's what I would feel comfortable with.

Actually, it is considered the gift to be in the wedding party to begin with. Same with OOT guests who have to travel. Only recently has it become common to also get a gift, and it's not what Emily Post would recommend.

I don't think a gift should ever be a requirement and agree with other posters a nice heartfelt card would be appreciated. That along with what he has already given should be more than enough.