If moh quit, is she still invited to wedding?

It sounds like she removed herself from your bridal party very respectfully despite the issues between the two of you, why wouldn't she still be a guest? Also, what do you mean she "dropped the ball on the RSVP's"?

So the RSVP's were coming to her since i only had 5 on mine and the rest was her family (shes my fiances cousin) she told me at my dress fitting " well someone rsvp'd but i dont know who it was." I asked her for the phone number 5 times she said "she has too many in her phone she doesnt know who, what do you want me to call all the numbers in my phone"

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I don't understand, why were phone numbers involved in the RSVP's? Were they digital or something? It sounds like you might have put a lot of responsibility on her that should've been given to you or your fiancé, that may have been why she backed out.

She’s your closest friend and your FH’s cousin. Unless you wave some major family drama, she should be invited.

People called in there RSVP. I guess it could have been to much responsibility but i didnt spring it on her. it was agreed before the invitations were sent out. I only mailed out 20 invitations.

I don't feel like its the responsibility of your MOH to keep track of who RSVPs to your wedding.. Based on your post, it seems like she may have gotten overwhelmed/stressed and felt like it was in hers and your best interest to remove herself at the MOH.. I would still invite her to your wedding.. not inviting her could potentially ruin your friendship forever.

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Good point. She just agreed to the rsvp because it was her family. she knew them better than i did.... i thought anyway

THanks

View Quoted Comment I mean, if it’s her family isn’t it FH’s family too? Why isn’t he handling RSVPs?

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That's understandable. I think sometime people to tend say "yes" not thinking through what it consists of.. maybe you can have you FH collect the numbers from her and he will have the same info/insight she had in regards to who they are.

Oh, that sounds stressful! I hope you're able to figure out the rsvps. If not, since it's just 20, maybe sending out a text or email to confirm again who's coming. I don't think you should uninvite her. I'm sorry you were let down. I'm also really disappointed in the lack of help and interest from my mom and sister. I'm wedding planning all alone. I'm not even asking for any help paying for anything, just feedback. They just say whatever you think is best. There won't be a shower or bachelorette. It hasn't even been mentioned at all.

Honestly, I understand your frustration -- but even if you to agreed prior to invitations being sent out... that's definitely not a MoH, thing. Not to me. I'm sure people have done it before, but if you want it done right the first time... you do it. To be frank, I would never have given anyone but my parents or FH/myself to depend on, for RSVPs. That's an important number, it costs money. She was polite in saying she'd assist, you but it can be quite overwhelming to be put in that position, despite the fact it doesn't seem so hard.

Also, the fact that you said that that she led you on about a bachelorette party... a major letdown, but no one is owed one. Do you have any bridesmaids? They're supposed to help plan with the MoH, she's just the leader, imo. It's not like you can't still do one, even if it's just hanging out. It doesn't need to be some crazy party, they're your friends/family first and your bridal party -- second.

Ultimately, I'm sorry you're feeling this way but sometimes it's hard for us brides to see from someone else's PoV -- who knows what happened. Still invite her, she's family. Not only that, but I don't know if you ever sat down to talk to her or how reasonable you've been with anything, she could have merely been overwhelmed as that's an easy spot to get caught up in the moment and then have stress crashing on you. The happy couple isn't the only one that feels the pressure.

I would. Ive seen a lot of ex bridesmaids end up as guests instead

She probably felt it was "in her best interest to remove herself from the wedding party" because of duties and expectations put on her by you. I would have felt like I was doing more for your wedding than you were. She was doing RSVPs because you only had 5 and the rest were her family?! They're coming to your wedding. If anything, FH could have done it, but considering you "only had 5" there's no reason you couldn't have done it.

You called her out about your bachelorette party? Something she's not even obligated to do? What was she being led on about?

Is she close with your FH? If so, and he asked her a question about dresses, she may have just answered without thinking about it.

In any case, she's a family member. Yes, she should be invited to the wedding as a guest. Not inviting a family member to a family event is probably not the best way to start things out.

It sounds like she wouldn’t come anyways but I might send a reminder text saying politely that she is not welcome.