I want to plan my wedding alone!

They really want to feel like a part of it, maybe you can give them a chore list (if that doesn't sound to pushy) for the bridal shower and bacherlette party and have them focus on those Ideas. That is why my bm and mohs are doing. I didn't give them a chore list I was just straight up honest and said, I want to plan the wedding my way, can you handle this for me though?

Could you try sharing things with your sister, like sending her pictures and letting her be excited with you so she feels included? My sister is also long distance, but really wants to be a part of the wedding planning--so I try to keep her posted on what I am doing, even though it is not practical to have her do much of the wedding planning. For bridal shower and bachelorette party (which aren't my responsibility anyway) she is doing all the planning. That keeps her happy, since she has a part.

Also, (please read this in as kind a tone as possible): it sounds from the tone of your post that you are likely to have problems from stress/anxiety as you get closer to the wedding if you don't relax a little. That is not to say that you need to leave decision making to others, but rather that it sounds like you are likely to be too tightly wound over small things/obsessing over details and will likely be too stressed out to enjoy the day and experience the fun. I really hope that is not the case and you find a way to enjoy planning and have fun with your mom and sister! It is wonderful that they care enough about you to want to be involved...can you see it that way? If you are so stressed, it will take away from the family joy and experience of the wedding. I say this just because I have seen too many stressed brides-to-be where wedding planning became a nightmare for everyone instead of excitement leading up to a happy day, and would hate for that to be one of the ww ladies!

Yeah I see what you're saying! I have a DOC for the day of, and I'm really just going to have to trust that she knows what she's doing and it will all be fine, but up until that day, I need to be in control of everything. Luckily I'm going super simple on the decor details and everything will be put together beforehand, and placed in specifically marked bins with directions on where/how it's supposed to go (yes, I'm crazy, I know). Since I do have to relinquish control that day, I'm going to try to make everything as foolproof as possible.

Good for you! I am a list-making person, and will also have everything all planned out...I'm preaching to myself here, too.

I hear ya - luckily my family lives in Chicago and I'm in Ohio so it's a lot easier to plan on my own. I include them with what I've picked or done, but I do it on my own. Nothing wrong with that...

Sounds like you got "issues"...LOL

Anywho, if you want to plan it alone, and I am quite sure that they already know about your "issues", then I suggest you just tell them that it is too stressful to have them help. Just come out and say you would much rather just do all the planning yourself.

Or, give them a task that you really don't care about just to keep them busy. Like come up with a time consuming, complicated, favor idea and have them put them together.

Thanks Riki...It's not really an issue unless I'm planning something. I'm not like this in my daily life...but when I'm planning an event, trip or party, I'm just way better off being in the lead so I know that what I want to get done, will actually get done. The favors are already picked, but I can have her put it together I guess.

There is NOTHING wrong with wanting to plan things alone. Especially when you know what you want! One thing I hate about helping brides is when they don't know what they want! An indecisive bride is the worst. I would rather have a contrl freak than someone who doesn't know what they want. Give them things to do that you could care less about so they don't feel left out.

Lol Desirae...my sister's (MOH) name is Desirae. I just freak a little. That's the thing...once I know what I want, I make the decision with no regrets. Having other's opinions, especially if they are different than mine, spins me out of control and then I have no idea what I want.

Hmm... I'm pretty much the same way haha. I'm planning everything on my own with the help of my guy

As for the rest of the crew, I let my maid of honor plan part of the bachelorette party herself, I am letting my parents plan the rehearsal dinner mostly themselves, and I am letting my FMIL plan a no-gifts Jack and Jill party mostly herself too. Just let people know that you got the wedding handled but they can plan the pre-wedding events. :-)

Yeah there is really nothing wrong with how you feel. I'm pretty much doing all the planning with the help of our wedding planner, with FH's input of course. My family keeps asking how they can help, but I really like to know exactly what is going on all the time and be in control. They know I have OCD so they kind of back off and I let them feel included by sending them pictures of the things I've decided on. They can help when it gets closer to the big day by helping me package everything that we'll need to take and then transporting it.

I was just like you, and still am when it Comes to things. I hate waiting for a result that might not be up to par, i also am perfectly capable of making decisions by myself! There were many things i didnt want anybody near because i didnt want to compromise my Vision. That said, i changed The way i Wan planning when i found out my venue was Turned into a Gift shop without any contact with me (i found out by myself on scouting trip!). My mom stepped in And had me at a newer, better venue (which i eventually booked) in about 15 minutes. I couldnt have handled that so quickly, calmly or efficiently in my panicked state. I had to let go of The reins and it was for The betterment of The wedding.

I'm in a similar boat. On one hand, I really like being able to plan everything on my own. Nothing falls through because of scheduling, no one flakes out on you, everything gets done, etc. You know what you need done, and how much time you have to do it. On the other hand, it's kind of sad to do it without friends or family. I'm noticing a lot of the fun of wedding planning comes from doing it as a group. About revving that collected excitement! There were a few things in hindsight that I wish I had help with: stamping my wooden silverware with our initials, making table runners, and making the bunting flag garlands for around my venue. Those were time consuming things I feel I could've trusted someone to help me with, but didn't cause I wanted to do it on my own. :/