Olivia
Savvy October 2020

i need advice.

Olivia, on September 24, 2019 at 8:12 PM Posted in Family and Relationships 0 12
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So my fiancé and I are two peas in a pod when it comes to almost everything... but halloween is something we don’t see eye to eye on. Recently I’ve finally picked up the paintbrush and started painting again. What’s my interest? Witches. And it’s something I’m good at. But he hates everything scary/evil/wicked what have you... I feel like my art might drive us apart because I’m REALLY good at what I do, but he just doesn’t like the same type of stuff. So when I’m doing what I love, the person I love can’t fully appreciate it... someone tell me what I need to do... Do I just need to put my paintbrush back down?

12 Comments

Latest activity by Nicole, on September 25, 2019 at 5:07 PM
  • Annie
    Dedicated October 2020
    Annie ·
    • Flag
    ABSOLUTELY NOT! Your art is for you. He doesn’t have to like it, you could probably sell it on Etsy or at a flea market. You don’t have to like the same things all of the time.
    • Reply
  • Ingrid
    VIP October 2020
    Ingrid ·
    • Flag
    I'm curious to know what his reasoning is. And he has taken the time to actually research the things he dislikes or is going along with the traditional reasons. Witches mix potions just like big pharmaceutical companies. I would challenge him to research things and see the art in EVERYTHING!!
    • Reply
  • Laree's
    Devoted May 2022
    Laree's ·
    • Flag
    I make tumbler cups and do you know how many times I’ve heard my fh complain about glitter, it’s all the time!! Lol he’s lucky though because I’m going back to school in Jan and won’t have time to make the cups anymore between school and my toddler. Before that though he used to mess with me about being an old lady and crocheting all the time. He just doesn’t get my need for crafting but he appreciates it when it comes to decorating and party planning. 😝 like pp said, you don’t always need to like or enjoy the same things, just do you!
    • Reply
  • Caytlyn
    Legend November 2019
    Caytlyn ·
    • Flag
    You’re allowed to have hobbies and interests that you don’t share with your partner.
    • Reply
  • Ivy ORP
    VIP October 2019
    Ivy ORP ·
    • Flag

    Just because something isn't what your FH is into doesn't mean you can't love and enjoy it! Do you feel like he is down on you for your art? If so, that is a problem. You should feel like you have space to flourish and grow. Don't ever let anyone cage you into their view of who you should be.

    • Reply
  • Ali
    Expert March 2021
    Ali ·
    • Flag
    Absolutely not! You do your art! So what if he doesn't like it. Continue to do what you love. I know its hard not to get validation or approval from the person you love most but don't let it stop you. If he can't see how much you enjoy it and love it then that's his loss.
    • Reply
  • Melle
    Legend June 2019
    Melle ·
    • Flag
    I like what PP said in that you're allowed to have your own hobbies and interests. Art is art. You're not harming anyone.
    • Reply
  • AshleyR
    Master January 2021
    AshleyR ·
    • Flag
    I’m confused, why would you have to stop painting? Why does it matter that he doesn’t care for the subject? Are you hanging all of these paintings up in your shared space? The only reason I can see an issue is if you are taking over the wall space with pictures he doesn’t like, then I would suggest you reach some sort of compromise like just hang up one, or turn a spare room in to your “gallery” so to speak.
    • Reply
  • Dayna
    Expert September 2021
    Dayna ·
    • Flag

    Please do not give up something you love to do! Lots of couples do not share the same hobbies, styles, or interests and that's okay. I agree with PP that if you are hanging them up all over the house and it makes him uncomfortable, then you might need to compromise on that, but I don't think it would be fair at all for him to expect you to just quit.

    • Reply
  • Littlebride
    Dedicated January 2020
    Littlebride ·
    • Flag
    My fh is also an artist and he often draws things I find creepy.... but that's doesn't mean I ask him to stop drawing !
    He loves drawing, it's his passion. Just because I think his drawing are creepy doesn't mean he has to stop.

    It's his thing. He likes it, I tell him my opinion when he asks for it. But I don't ever tell him to stop drawing !

    I mean, I wouldn't want his drawings in our living room.. but he's allowed to keep them and can continue to draw all he wants.
    • Reply
  • Jennifer
    VIP August 2021
    Jennifer ·
    • Flag

    Do not put that paintbrush down! Paint what you want! He has no say in your hobbies!

    • Reply
  • Nicole
    Devoted April 2021
    Nicole ·
    • Flag

    DO NOT put the brush down. You're art is yours and your expression is important! Who cares if he doesn't like it. my FH and I disagree on minor things like this but it doesn't affect how much I love him. When I get creative he tries to be creative too. Something when doing the painting for pottery or something, he reacts silly and i think he is to much of a dork, but that's why I love him. You two are different people and that's why you work so well!
    Have you tried painting something he would be interested in just to see what happens? strong suite or not, he should be supportive if he doesn't like it. Just remember, do what you love because it makes you happy!!

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