I made the mistake. Our guest list is too big for the venue.

I think you should make some cuts - better to plan as if all are coming.

Redo it.

It doesn't matter what people may have been told, what matters is they haven't received a STD yet so they are not yet formally invited.

Cut the unnecessary people ASAP, if they ask for an explanation say you had to make cuts due to venue capacity. End of story.

You're really fine. This would be an issue if the STD's had gone out.

Bah this is hard. Everything I've ever seen says some people will NOT come but that could get you in hot water later.

I'd probably gamble it and pray 8 people didn't come (but I'd also call the venue and ask what happens if they do).

The smart thing would be to redo it but I had a firm "no cuts" policy from the get go and sacrificed other things so I could follow that. I realize that's probably different and it wouldn't be a big deal if you did.

Are any of those 118 children/babies? Does the 118 include you and FH? I would talk to your venue and see what their advice is - if a few more people could be fit it, or if it would be extremely cramped even at 110. Chances are, a few people won't be able to make it - but the more you can cut down your guest list, the better. Are you close at all to the people FH told would be invited? Not sure if you can you have him take it back...

Yes, make cuts now. Even if FH has told them they are coming, you don't have to invite them. Either tell him not to mention it again (only addressing it if they bring it up), or he needs to call and tell these people they are not in fact invited. Don't invite more than your venue can hold. Even at their "max" it will likely be a tight squeeze anyhow.

I would just cut out the plus 1's to ensure they won't bring anyone. That leaves 3 more people.

This is so tough! On the one hand I want to say that you'll totally be fine, and with 118 guests invited there will definitely be at least 8 people if not more who RSVP no, buuuuut it's hard to risk!

Ok I called the venue and my venue coordinator suggested that we do not have a cake table. We are having a very small one tier cake for FH and I to cut and the staff will be serving sheet cakes from the kitchen. Since there won't be a cake table they can put an extra table that seats 10. Plus she forgot that we are doing a sweetheart table so we can actually fit two extra tables where the typical head table would be at. I feel so relieved right now.

I'm on the gamble side but NO EXTRAS AT ALL NO MATTER WHAT (caps are for your fiance) Our venue can comfortably hold 130 we're at 144, we can make it work if they all come but we not for a fact right now at LEAST 4 we know can't come.

I'm currently playing this same roulette game and it has been the most stressful part of planning! Luckily I didn't send out STDs to everyone, so I decided to last minute cut some cousins who were obligatory invites whom I dont have much of a relationship with. You will probably get at least 8 declines, but, it is not worth the stress you will go through waiting to see, TRUST me.

Saw your update---glad it works for an extra table. if it didn't I'd say make the cuts now. I think most people are rather understanding about venue size

I'm not sure it's something you want to risk. Also, my venue capacity count includes vendors, so make sure you're accounting them for them as well.

ETA: Just saw your update. Glad it worked out well.

I'm in a similar (probably worse) boat. Stated venue capacity is 280 - I've identified 19 who cannot make it or children/guests who will not be brought, but we need 11 more declines to get down to capacity (which would be cozier than we wanted). We are dumb and goofed big time. May be able to play with the kids seating if needed, but for now we just have to wait...

Edit: typo

That turned out well. And in all honesty, it is unlikely that you will get a 100% yes rate, but it's good to always be prepared to accommodate everyone. Another thing that can be disappointing is that some people might RSVP yes and then not show on the day of.

Yeah I told FH to stop talking about the wedding with his coworkers so they don't expect an invite just in case something goes wrong. I am a little worried because my aunt and uncle like to travel to parties with an entourage of all my aunt's daughters (my step cousins whom I never speak to) and their children. We are addressing invites to specific people and using the line on the RSVP "We have reserved ___ number of seats in your honor" with the # of accept and # of decline. Hoping that will help deter any unwanted guests.

You should also consider that the venue's max capacity is usually more than will fit comfortable. They will count for 10 people at a 60" round table when that size table usually only fits eight people comfortably. My personal rule of thumb when searching for venues was to consider 80% of the venues max capacity as our maximum for the guest list.

@Sunni brings up a really good point. You want your guests to be comfortable and have a good time. If I'm packed in like a sardine I'm peeved every time I'm at the table, waiting in line at the bar, and pressed up next to a random person on the dance floor.

Those are good points. Crap. Back to cutting people from the list

I'd probably gamble on it and invite everyone anyway, but ask yourself what happens if they all RSVP yes? If you can't handle it, then you do need to make cuts.

It's a good thing we're under count because my FH verbally invites at least one new person every week. Need a zipper on that boy, hah.