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Mandi
Master October 2020

i just want this to be over.

Mandi, on October 21, 2020 at 4:17 PM Posted in Planning 0 18
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Nightmare.

Anybody else.
I'm just over it.Postponed once.We were 11 days away.We're now 10 days away.And it feels like everything is imploding again.I just want this to happen, get it over with, and never think about wedding planning ever again.

18 Comments

Latest activity by Kari, on October 31, 2020 at 1:23 PM
  • Margaret
    Master October 2020
    Margaret ·
    • Flag
    Are you over it because of Covid? Or something else? Planning is what we make of it and I know that sounds harsh, sometimes you just have to go with your gut and push forward. Have faith, it will all work out as it was always meant to.
    • Reply
  • Melle
    Rockstar June 2019
    Melle Online ·
    • Flag

    Ah i hope things work out for you

    • Reply
  • Sexypoodle
    Master October 2021
    Sexypoodle ·
    • Flag
    Weddings are joyous occasions that don’t require the amount of pressure that I often read about it on here. Sorry that you’re feeling stressed right now. But take a step back, relax and realize that it will all work out and you’ll have a great time. Congrats on being 10 days away and best wishes!
    • Reply
  • Mandi
    Master October 2020
    Mandi ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    Yes. Last time the state shut down. The state is trying to shut down again. I can't tell people at my workplace to wear a mask.
    I'm sick of people asking me how I am.
    What the plan is.If I knew, I wouldn't look so tired.
    • Reply
  • L
    Expert September 2020
    ·
    • Flag
    Thats exactly how I felt, and still do. Just try to enjoy your day whenever it does happen and dont worry about the details too much. You are marrying your FH thats all that matters
    • Reply
  • Minimalist Bride
    Master April 2021
    Minimalist Bride ·
    • Flag
    Girl, yes! I'm iver it too sometimes.
    • Reply
  • Kristen
    Just Said Yes May 2020
    Kristen ·
    • Flag

    Im with ya girl. We postponed a month and half before our big day (not nearly as close as you had to) but now that were about half a year away our planner recommends postponing another year which would make it two years after our original intended date. I'm crushed and devastated. I hope your big day is everything you dreamed of and more and goes off without a hitch. You got this and you deserve this day. Enjoy it.

    • Reply
  • Rachel
    Savvy August 2020
    Rachel ·
    • Flag
    Honestly best thing we did was change it from in person to zoom for our close friends/family and just get married on our date with officiant and two witnesses. Then we spent two nights at a resort celebrating us. Hopefully we can have our reception next year but now we are two months married, the stress is gone, and we didn’t have to worry about hosting a 30+ person event during covid. Best of luck, whatever you choose will be the right decision for you!
    • Reply
  • Heather
    Expert August 2020
    Heather ·
    • Flag
    Mandi, I totally get it. We were supposed to get married April 30, 2020 and had to postpone a month out. Not as bad as ten days, but it still sucked. We moved out of state two months before our August wedding, and I swear to god, EVERY SINGLE THING that could have possibly went wrong leading up to the day of went wrong. I was having meltdowns for over a month.
    My advice to you is breathe, cry it out, breathe lol. Sometimes you just need to let it out. It will be over soon. Just keep moving on with the love of your life, and enjoy the day, because the day will be beautiful, no matter what goes wrong. And then it will be over and it will all be fine again. Honestly, hubby and I fought so much leading up to the wedding and it has been literal bliss since the day of.
    It’s going to be ok! Good luck girl ❤️ If you need someone to vent to, don’t hesitate !!
    • Reply
  • Pirate & 60s Bride
    Legend March 2017
    Pirate & 60s Bride ·
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    View Quoted Comment
    Ugh. Which state are you in? Hugs! 🤗 Or a drink! 🍸
    • Reply
  • Mandi
    Master October 2020
    Mandi ·
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    View Quoted Comment
    Illinois..
    • Reply
  • Yasmine
    Rockstar October 2020
    Yasmine ·
    • Flag
    Aww I hope it all works out in the end
    • Reply
  • Jamie
    Dedicated November 2020
    Jamie ·
    • Flag
    I totally get it. I postponed from July 2020 to now November 2020 and we’re 15 days out. We’re just having a Micro Wedding ceremony. No reception and at this point I don’t even want a reception at a later date. The closer it gets to the new date things are getting hectic. I have stopped worrying about it. Whatever happens will just happen cause I’m getting married regardless. I have to think this way because if I keep worrying about every little thing i’ll be sick and I’m not doing that to myself. I know it’s easier said than done, but just trust that your day will be beautiful no matter the circumstance.
    • Reply
  • Jenn M
    Dedicated February 2021
    Jenn M ·
    • Flag
    I feel you girl but hang in there!
    My original date was 5/1/20, one month before we postponed to 9/5/20. One month before 9/4 we moved to 2/13/21 and I told my FH and parents that I will not move again. In all honestly if my venue would give us even partial of our money back I would have done that a long time ago. Im now having to uninvite 100+ people, and it’s just not the wedding I originally planned and dreamed of. I know I can wait longer and have that 200 person wedding but, at this point I am over stressing out and I’m over planning I just want to get married and move on with our lives. We are here hoping and praying out venue doesn’t close again but if it does, we are getting married and we will figure out the money situation later.

    I wish you all the best!!!! I hope your day is beautiful and you find at least a little bit of peace throughout all this craziness!
    • Reply
  • Candace
    Dedicated October 2020
    Candace ·
    • Flag
    I felt this same exact way. But I regret it. Try to enjoy everything even the things that don’t go right. Before you know it, it will be the day after and you won’t have to think of one wedding planning thing again!
    • Reply
  • Suzanne
    Dedicated July 2021
    Suzanne ·
    • Flag

    It really isn't fair. So many of my friends and family got married in the "normal times" where their biggest concern was picking out shoes for the bridesmaids. I feel the world dealt me a horrific blow with this pandemic. I postponed once because my grandparents were scared to come to the wedding, although they would have taken the risk for me. I don't want to be responsible for anyone's health and safety. It was devastating to hear my best friend say that she wouldn't attend my wedding because gatherings are irresponsible. I blew up at her last week when she said that summer 2021 still wasn't good enough for her. My wedding planner tried to cheer me up talking about matching masks and socially-distancing dance floor alternatives. That's not the fairytale wedding I've dreamed of since I was a little girl! I feel like this is the only outlet that understands my misery and grief. I just want a normal, fairytale wedding where I can be with my closest friends and family without the worry of who might die from covid from attending my wedding. It's devastating...

    • Reply
  • Alexandria
    Expert November 2020
    Alexandria ·
    • Flag

    I'm so sorry Mandi, I feel the same way, I'm 8 days out and I couldn't be more over it. Seriously, with every single part of it. I'm trying to stay positive but it's definitely hard. Just remember that you're going to be a beautiful bride and really really soon you get to marry the love of you life and never have to deal with wedding planning again! That's what I keep telling myself to get through the last little bit lol. Smiley heart Keep your head up, and we are always here for support, you got this!! Smiley heart

    • Reply
  • Kari
    VIP May 2020
    Kari ·
    • Flag

    Covid is awful.

    We plopped our invites in the mail on a mostly normal Monday and by Friday that week everything was shutting down (this was back in March). Fast forward to May, when we are supposed to have our wedding, and the state is shut down so we cancel, but then my mom gets diagnosed with cancer, so we decide to marry at the last minute anyway. My husband and I host my mom, her friend (who wasn't invited to our wedding but came anyway), and my best friend all weekend, because hotels and restaurants are closed, and we have a small 2 bedroom, 1 bathroom house so he's cooking food for all these people, they're sleeping on couches, I'm sharing my 90 square foot bathroom with three other women while getting ready for my own wedding, etc.
    We do a small ceremony with just 8 guests that is pretty much just vows, a first dance, and cutting a cake and serving champagne, and my husband's parents won't even hug us because they are so afraid of Covid and every time my mom wants to hug me over the weekend she asks permission first, which is really freaking awkward when it's your wedding and you just found out one of you might be dying.

    We postponed our bigger event to June of next year. We considering moving our date to the summer or fall, but I doubted things would improve (that instinct turned out to be correct) and I'm really doubtful things will be better my mid-2021 either, but at least we are married. The day itself may have been stressful and disappointing, but being able to call my husband "my husband" feels really special and its one of the only good things that happened to us this year.

    If you want to get married, just do it. For us legally marrying takes some of the pressure off when (or even if) the big event happens. I'm sad that I didn't get the full experience so many other brides have gotten (and that I waited a long time for) but putting off marriage for years or more just was too stressful for me. We're in our mid 30s (he recently turned 38, and I'll be 35 before the end of the year) so I just didn't want to wait any longer. The timing of the pandemic has really put a wrench in our life plans, with not being able to celebrate getting married with those important to us, and now forcing us to either try for a baby during a pandemic or waiting until I'm even more of a high risk pregnancy (and now, I have the additional worry of "what happens if I do get pregnant and something goes wrong and I can't terminate my pregnancy if I need to because Roe v Wade gets overturned and then I die and my husband is a widower before 40"). I get really sad about it, but at least being married, in spite of what sometimes feels the world conspiring against us, feels wonderful and significant.

    I feel really sorry for all of the couples going through navigating weddings and family planning during this time. We all want it to be over.

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