I don't even want to plan a wedding anymore... just need to vent.

I feel you on a small level of this. There was a period of time when I just stopped talking to my mother as she was being SO pushy about her opinions and the harder I tried to make her happy and included the worse it got. I think that in the end she just felt a bit left out as I am literally across the country from her, and so she is not getting to help with her only daughter's wedding as she probably wanted. It got fixed when I finally had enough and burst into tears because she kept hurting my feelings. Now we talk every week and I try to keep her more in the loop. Talk to your mom and let her know that she is stressing you out. Keep your head up and remember the reason you are doing this - because you and your FH love each other!

Honestly an elopement sounds like it might be the best way to go for you guys! Just have the people who really support you and your FH and leave all the drama behind.

Do whatever you want to do that makes you happy. if you want to elope then everyone else be damned. if you want to elope and have a party at a later date when the dust has settled then you can do that too. don't feel pressured to make everyone else happy, it's supposed to be about you and your partner.

Elope. And tell them afterwards.

That sounds tough. Don't be afraid to do what will make you happy. Others will just have to get over it.

Eloping might be the best option with everything going on. Just have your closest family and friends there and just enjoy the day instead of worrying about all the stress

I'd elope given those circumstances. Have a great vacation!

If eloping is something you want to do then you should do it! But if you still want your wedding that you are planning just ignore everything and just keep going. My FMIL caused an issue with me which led to an issue with her and FH then caused an issues with his whole family against us. We can't make everyone happy and since they have decided to ignore us completely I'm not going to sit and wait for them to apologize (because it'll never happen!) I just continued planning as I was. If I would have let it get to me I'd go crazy. If they decide not to show up well that's on them. If they do show up... who knows how that will go. But just try to ignore to the best of your ability all the outside stressors. Eloping would have been much easier but I wasn't going to let them make us change the wedding we both wanted.

I would elope and have that ceremony be full of positive emotions rather than a 'wedding' with so much drama and stress. You can still dress up and go to a fancy restaurant with the 2 people that join you guys. Like Celia said, tell everyone AFTER the elopement.

Exactly what Tulip said! It would be totally worth it to have a smaller, happy and joyful ceremony than to go through months of drama and stress.

Richard is giving you EXCELLENT advice. Do what Richard says. It's an especially good idea to clarify your thinking with your FH only and to then proceed without letting other family members muddy things, whatever it is that you decide to do.

If you still want to have a wedding, there is no law that says you have to have a passel of attendants. We are having no attendants except for my niece, who is going to carry my train, and my other niece, who will hand out bird seed to toss. Everyone else is a guest. If you make your fractious family members guests, then they can either show up or not, and you aren't trying to depend on them for anything. And don't let anyone hassle you into inviting or working with people who will stress you out. Just smile and say "no", repeatedly if necessary.