i could use a pep talk

Your mom may be disappointed that it's not as glitter and princess y as she hoped but that doesn't mean she won't be happy my mom was the same, she was even hella disappointed I didn't cover up my tattoos but... In the end she told me she was still happy for me.

Your mom might envision a different wedding than you want, but what she really wants is to see you happy with someone who is good to you. Don't let her vision cloud your joy, it will all come together.

Have you talked to your FH about wanting him to share in the excitement and planning? You can't control how he feels or reacts, but maybe just hearing him say how much he's looking forward to marrying you will help. My FW gets overwhelmed easily so you can imagine how planning a wedding is sitting with her these days. Yet when I get frenzied she just grabs me and tells me we get to be married soon in a way that shows me there is excitement there even if she can't show it all the time.

If you are feeling doubts or sad, look inward to see if those are feelings based on how other people are reacting or on something deeper. Make sure YOU are happy and comfortable with all that is happening. Good luck to you.

Is there anything you can let your mom do that you don't care about? For me, it was flowers & favors & linens. I couldn't care less if those were white, black, or bright orange. I wanted favors but didn't care what they were. She also handled hotel welcome bags. She got to be involved (she did a catering tasting & dress shopping with me too) with everything but got to take the lead with things I'd rather have her be happy about since I didn't care either way.

Can you plan a honeymoon and just leave a week later? Or a few months later?

I think the thing to remember is that at the end of the day, you are marrying your person. That's the whole point of all of this. Your mom may not be happy about everything, but she will get over it. My mom isn't happy about some of my choices when it comes to my wedding, but it's my wedding and she will get over it. You have to realize that even though its a big, important day, it's also just a one day party. And after that day, life goes on. So make it what YOU want it to be, celebrate the way YOU want to, and I promise you she will still be happy watching you marry the love of your life. As for your fiance acting uninterested, I think that is totally normal. I have planned everything for ours. My fiance has offered maybe 2 opinions the entire planning process (choosing a second meat for catering, and deciding he doesn't want to do a first look). He still tells me he can't wait to marry me and he talks about how excited he is for the honeymoon and stuff. But he doesn't even know what our first dance song is cause he says he doesn't really care and to just pick something. I think it overwhelms him when I'm going on and on about wedding stuff, and maybe your fiance is the same. Maybe it's not that he's uninterested, but that the wedding itself is just not what he's most excited for. Since you can't have a honeymoon, maybe you should plan a fun family mini vacation or even just a day of fun afterwards. It doesn't have to be super pricey, but you can still have fun and celebrate with your husband and your kids.

I am so grateful for all of your responses! It has really helped. For one, it's always nice to feel like you're not alone. But it's also nice to get a little perspective and to be reminded of what's truly important.

Thank you all so much!

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That's a great idea - I'm going to ask her to help me with the guest bags, figuring out what to put in them, and then shopping with me for them. She's not really able to do it by herself but she can certainly direct me on it! Thanks!