i backed out as a bridesmaid...😔

It sounds like you did the right thing for your own self respect, nothing wrong with that.

Does anyone have this kind of experience as well? Before, I don't want to back out because I want to support the bride, but I think the comments I received were quite uncalled for. Upon mincing the comments I received, I got turned off. First, they pressured me to look good and at least lose some weight, but then they won't let me get the right amount of fabric, which would make me look and feel uncomfortable wearing it. I will pay for a gown which will make me feel uncomfortable and I won't even get to wear it in the future as well 😩

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Thank you for your comment. I was actually in tears because the bride and her mom were so disappointed. I get that and I respect them but I wouldn't consider pulling out if I didn't get those nasty comments. 😔

How did the bride take you stepping down? I wonder if she doesn’t feel the same as her mom. I know my mom can say some really dumb a*** crap that does not reflect my feelings. I feel like if one of my bridesmaids came to me with the concerns like you have I would have tried to do anything in my power to accommodate them. I know some of my bridesmaids were strapped on money and I paid for 4 of 6 of their dresses and would have happily pay over again to just have them with me on my special day. If the bride was dismissive of your feelings, I 100% think you did the right thing.

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Thank you for your comment 🥲 She was really disappointed but I think she knew all about what her mom was saying when she called me since I heard her mom ask her to help her turn off her phone after we had our conversation. 😞

Oh wow. Stepping down sounds like a blessing in disguise all around. While you didn’t have to pay for the dress, the mom’s meltdown and blaming her miscalculations on you, including the inviting you of obligation, is completely uncalled for. I would not want to associate with any of them after that.

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Thank you for your comment. 🥲 Unfortunately, I already bought shoes prior to this episode since they asked me to wear high heels because I was to be partnered with a tall guy. I dont really wear high heels as I see no future use of it as well since I dont really attend events. I am grateful for sharing your thoughts, it means a lot that my actions were justified. 🥲

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None of this is ok. Absolutely step down. This bride is not supporting YOU as a person, please please please do not feel bad about not "supporting" her. Support does not = treating your friends like props. You can still support her marriage as a guest or from afar without accepting horrible treatment.

View Quoted Comment Thank you for your response. I was really enlightened with your opinion. You are absolutely right. Friends/bridesmaids shouldn’t be treated as mere props. 🥲

View Quoted Comment In that case, return the shoes to the store for a refund

Your feelings are valid and you shouldn’t stand for it. Sometimes people forget how to treat others in situations and there’s no excuse.
I was in my sisters wedding and only asked that she not choose strapless dresses because my arms are problematic. Well of course she picked strapless and I
Had no choice. There were several instances where she treated me badly as if I was not her only sibling. This was 10 yrs ago. To this day I wish I had stepped out of the wedding party completely.

EXACTLY what Lady said!!!! ^^^^
You do not deserve that and I am so glad you were the bigger person to step down. Let them be disappointed! They saw you as someone to just FILL IN rather than a BRIDESMAID. It's more disappointing for them to see you in that sense rather than an actual person. In my opinion I would not feel bad at all for stepping down because you know your worth and how they acted isn't worth stressing over. They can figure it out. And if they say anything then that just shows they were not supportive of you from the beginning. Again! SO PROUD of you for stepping down! You are protecting yourself especially in the long run

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Wait. They told you to lose weight? Tell them to shove it. I would 100% step down... They are not being respectful to you at all.

You did what you had to do in an uncomfortable situation , 💯

View Quoted Comment Ugh, that’s so disheartening to hear. I’m sorry that it happened to you, you definitely did the right thing. I know it’s easy for people to say you did the right thing but I’m sure you’re processing the feelings of the friendship in total, not just in regards to the wedding. I can only imagine how hurt you feel by all of it.

Wow. Those people suck. You did the right thing.

So sorry this happened to you. Hopefully your friendship is in tact, if you want it to be, but this woman is so disrespectful, and if your friend isn't fully standing up for you, that's disrespectful too!!