How/when Should i lower my guest count?

I would do it before you send invites rather than after when people have RSVPd

Following. My wedding is 10/24/20 and I may have to reduce guest count by 30-50 lol. I’ve already asked for peoples addresses and sent save the dates sooo I don’t know how or if I should explain that they can’t come because I can only fit 100 people in the ballroom due to social distancing. Our family alone is like 60-70.

Note, I would let them know you would love for them to come but due to Covid you have to keep to family or intimate gatherings, and invite them maybe to a live stream of the ceremony.

I definitely wouldn’t invite everyone just to uninvite some later. Depending on your venue and when they need a final head count, I would invite your smallest number first if it’s 50 or however many, and then maybe beginning of September if you were able to invite the rest send out the second wave of invites.

Definitely do it before - don't invite them planning to have to uninvite them.

I would do it before that way it doesn’t raise an eyebrow for mists if your guests. I could only imagine being invited to something then get uninvited I’d feel horrible lol.

I don’t know where you’re located but We are allowed 120 @ our 8/2 wedding so you may be ok by October 🤷🏼‍♀️

View Quoted Comment Lol ours in Ohio is 300 but other gatherings are no more than 10....

You actually invited them with the Save the Date. You need to have a conversation with people NOW and whatever you do, do NOT send them invitations. Sending invitations on top of the STDs and then uninviting people is beyond rude and frankly might get you uninvited from their lives.

Hey, also a 'Marisa' and getting married this October. We're sending invites in July and I would personally do it prior to sending invites. I would also check with your venue / caterer to find out how soon they would need to know as well. Hope that helps

View Quoted Comment

Sarah, where are you located and what are the guidelines the venue is giving? Are they requiring masks and no dancing?

View Quoted Comment

I'm located in CA and so far all I know is no more than 10 people are allowed still. But Disneyland is supposed to open up again in July, sooo if that's the case then I should be able to have more than 10 by October hopefully haha.

View Quoted Comment I’m in Maryland and they’ve said nothing about either (masks or no dancing) they just have a limit on capacity. The only limitation they have is with food. The venue is owned by a catering company that normally serves buffet style and that is not allowed. If the venue wasn’t owned by a caterer, I am gathering we could have as many guests as the venue decided to allow. Also there are 0 limitations on outdoor weddings. I know some people have just chosen to move DJ and dance floor outdoors for their wedding. Something to consider.

View Quoted Comment Yeah our governor relaxes after protests. He hinted he found it absurd that people could protest in the streets but not open their small business etc.

Thanks everyone for the advice! Just wanted to know your thoughts, and it makes total sense now to just reduce my guest count before sending invites. And I'm thinking about live streaming the ceremony for those that I had to un-invite. Just gotta figure that out now 🤔

I think some depends on how many people you were going to have to begin with. I took my oldest daughter to a wedding of her violin teacher yesterday afternoon. Then originally planned only about 80 guests . After about 20 called to say, sorry. .... They changed seating. Instead of usual banquet seating, they got 4 person table for couples and small families. And a few rectangular 8 ' tables. They just kept people who all sheltered in place together, at one table. And tables about 8-10 feet apart. With a nuclear family and two grandparents who liver separately but shared day care hours all week, And all 3 couples ,5 who work in close quarters every day , forming one group, people watched from their seats, a wide aisle up the center lawn for the procession. It was like being in a restaurant with tables pushed far apart, but lots of extra space between. I counted 21 tables small and large. On the lawn, with an overhead tent top only. And catering staff used two tiered carts, and pushed the carts up to each table with the few meals for them ( with covers) toward the diners, one would stand and give the others their meals. Not the fanciest service, but it worked, and accommodating with small tables of people who could be close together and very large distances between, made a lot more sense than one we passed on a church property last weekend which had a little coctail table for 1 and all tables just 6-8 feet apat in a grid. The reality is, family, or sometimes 2 families, who can be treated like one household since they are in family home, or work, close contact every day, make up most weddings. There was no dancing. People talked table to table, louder than usual. We shared with the mother and son and daughter who live in the same duplex, other half of our 2 unit farmhouse. We share daycare, have 8 children, 4 parents and 2 elders as our group for the duration. Sou 5 of us were our own table.
With no dancing, I think a few in the coworker group did not bring SO.
So see what grouping people who shelter together already means. And seat them at small tables close together, but tables way apart does. It eliminates 40 inches of central space at each table that is unused. I thought they did a very good job, and the small dance team with fiddlers to replace dancing, put on a nice 40 minute show, open air.