My wedding is about 13 months away so I know I have time to tackle this but every time I feel secure in our decision I read an article on how horrible we are for not inviting kids and I play all of the possible fights and arguments that may come from relatives in my mind and have a small panic attack.
But our reason for not inviting kids isn’t what these articles are claiming. It’s not because kids can be loud or could disrupt the ceremony or anything like that. It’s because we simply can not afford them. My mom is 1 of 12 and each of her siblings have multiple children (about 4-6) these are my first cousins and 80 percent of those cousins have children that I can’t afford. I can afford the 11 of her siblings and their spouses and my first cousins but I can afford my cousins children. And that’s only one side of the family I still have my dads and then my fiancé’s families.
So how can we get the message across that the reason their kids aren’t invited isn’t because we don’t want them there but because we really can’t afford it without doubling our guest list and increasing our budget well above what we can afford.
My fiancé and I are paying for our wedding completely out of pocket. We are not taking out loans or using our savings or credit cards we are simply saving from every paycheck a certain amount that will give us the exact number we need to cover the wedding, limo, wedding night accommodation, hair makeup and attire.
So the only way to invite everyones children is to cut the limo, wedding night accommodations, hair and makeup and attire just to afford the kids and we can’t do that.
We just want our guests to know it’s seriously not personal as to why their kids can’t come. It has everything to do with not being able to afford it. It wouldn’t be right to invite some children but not all. So we aren’t having any. But if there’s a way to communicate that so maybe it’s not such a hard blow to them when they see their kids aren’t invited please let me know. This anxiety is killing me.
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