How to invite some but not others?

You can tell them that your venue only allows you to invite x amount of people and you couldn't accommodate for all of them. You are very sorry that you can't have everyone you know and love there but you only have so much room.

Good response, far too excited. My two cents: don't forget to add that you have limited resources and thereby cannot invite any more people than you already planned for. It's YOUR day so you should only have who you want there to be there. End of story.

Same dilemna..i am telling those already that we have a limit and that's it.

That's good advice and we do have big family on both side

I don't think that solves the dilemma. Having limited space doesn't explain your selection process. IMO you need to have clearly defined rules. Have a cutoff point. Do aunts/uncles only or nothing beyond 1st cousins. If you invites some cousins and not others it will definitely create some tension.

Invite whoever you want. But realize that it won't stop some people from being offended. It is up to you.

FH has a large family. We are only inviting immediate family. His sisters/brother and their spouses, parents and my family (my family isn't that large). A few very close friends. None of his aunts/uncles because there's way too many and he didn't want to choose between them.

Thanks for your feedback everyone. Ultimately, I think I'm just going to have to accept that I can not please everyone and in all probability I will offend someone. If money were not an issue I would not have to be as discriminating -- but it is.

I know exactly how you feel and I've had to come to the same conclusion. My FH and I have HUGE families and many friends, so knowing that we're considering have a "mini" reception for the local guests (like classmates and old co-workers). We don't want to slight anyone, but this was our only option to seeing everyone and having a great time. Our "grand" reception will consist of out of town guest, family, close friends, and our wedding party. Since the reception venue can only hold so many guests this may be our best compromise.

I know it will be a little tedious with the invitations, but It will get down. I hope things go well for you!

You just have to do it. You might be super close to one cousine but hardly speak to another. So why invite the one you barely know? It doesn't make since. And I am sure that cousin feels the same way about having to go to your wedding.

And if someone brings it up, you just have to apologize and say you wish you could have invited everyone but you just were not able to.

We are having a very small wedding/reception, and I have a large extended family that live a good distance away. I know in all probability they will not travel, so we are making our "cut-off" immediate family and very close friends.

Once married, we will be sending out announcements to our extended families. If some one takes offense? Huh, oh well. At my age, I'm way over it. Besides, over the decades I've sent way more wedding gifts to family members and their kids to make my head spin(and never received thank you notes for!). So I figure if they're offended they didn't get an invite it saved them from having to reciprocate the gift I sent!

So, we're only inviting select children - out of state and bridal party, basically. I'm comfortable with our decision. I'm wondering if we should put a blurb on our wedding website to explain or if we should just let it rest and deal with it as it comes up.