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Devoted August 2018

How to invite Flower Girl & siblings, but not other children to reception

Christina, on February 22, 2017 at 11:08 AM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 4

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Our flower girl is the youngest daughter of one of my cousins and we know she obviously has to be invited to the reception. However, she has two older siblings (9 and 12) that are younger than we want at our reception, but understand it's awkward to not invite them. However, I have many other cousins with young children that I do not want at the reception and am concerned they will be angered to know only one cousin's kids were invited. We simply do not have the capacity (~25 more children) and I do not want my wedding being overrun with children either. What is the best way to handle this situation? Help!!

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4 Comments

Latest activity by spring 2017, on February 22, 2017 at 12:29 PM

Master April 2014
Nonna T · on February 22, 2017 at 11:10 AM
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Don't have a flower girl.
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Beginner June 2017
CNP · on February 22, 2017 at 11:18 AM
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My sister suggested including specific names on the rsvp card included in the invitation and simply listing the adults only. It's a simple way to say adults only without having to say don't bring your kids.
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VIP June 2017
Linda · on February 22, 2017 at 11:18 AM
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We had a similar situation. Our flower girl has a younger brother who is five so we just chose to have him as the ring bearer. Can you possibly make the other children ushers of some sort so that they have some type of role? We are only having children at the wedding who are participating. In total 3 kids.
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Devoted May 2017
spring 2017 · on February 22, 2017 at 12:29 PM
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On the invitations for the parents of the flowergirl, put "...and family" on the addressed envelope. If you are doing inner envelopes, list all the people by name: each parent and each child. (Etiquette police lose their minds when this isn't done properly)

We're doing the same thing. We have flowergirls, but are also inviting the brothers in those families. No other children are invited. On our wedding website we put, "Due to space constraints and the tone of the event, we will be having an adults-only reception. Only children included in the wedding party will be included at the reception. We apologize if this inconveniences any of our guests." Our wedding and reception are in the evening and with an open bar. I've also personally called several parents to explain, saying something along the lines of "we want you to be able to relax, drink and not have to worry about bedtimes"
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