How to Honor My Deceased Friend?

I’m sorry for your loss. Maybe carry a charm with his photo in your bouquet, but I wouldn’t have an empty chair. That can be very eerie to some people.

I recently saw a wedding of a couple, and the bride's son had passed. They had an empty chair at the ceremony with his picture and a sash around it saying "Reserved for ________", again this was her son, and it was at the ceremony not the reception. I've also seen bride's pin a photo or something of the person's to their dress of bouquet. You could have someone read a poem or favorite memory of you two? I am sorry for you loss OP and hope you can come up with something.

A rose ceremony

I wouldn’t do the empty chair.

Adding to that since I hit reply too soon...you can add a small picture in a charm to your bouquet or you can have his picture on the memory table without including everyone who has passed away. We only had a picture of H’s parents (they’ve both passed away) even though we’ve both lost grandparents, cousins, friends, and other family members.

Maybe a candle with a small sign like the one in the picture. Your guests will know who you mean. But you can always go the charm on the bouquet route if you still want to honor him specifically.

My grandfather passed away about 2.5 weeks before our wedding. We had an empty chair at our family table with a picture of him & one of his suit jackets with the boutineer. I had the picture at a spot that I could see from the head table. Our wedding was mostly family with a few close friends that are family, so everyone knew what had happened and they all thought it was nice.

So sorry for your loss. I personally find an empty chair a bit morbid. I like the charm idea, or sewing something (a piece of fabric from a clothing item they gave you, a trinket they gave you) into a layer of your dress if that is possible/practical. I think a table of photos or a sign/announcement about loved ones you have lost is lovely.

View Quoted Comment That’s Beautiful.

I think its very morbid on a happy day. Could you attach a charm to your bouquet with a picture of him or something you two loved.

I love the idea of having a chair with a sash on it at the ceremony! That's really sweet, and I don't find that morbid TBH. But, I wouldn't put a seat at your reception...

The bouquet idea is nice too, or you could look into maybe getting a locket with his picture?

First I am so sorry for your loss. We had a friend pass suddenly a few days before my BF's wedding, she had a candle lit for him with his photo placed just before the entrance to the reception. She also had a photo charm on her bouquet. He was represented well and we all had a drink in his memory together.

Honestly I think the empty chair is very sad, but this is a personal decision.

I am sorry for your loss.

I lost my father December of last year and I lost a very close friend of mine in September. I am going to have a charm with their picture in it hanging off my bouquet. I do not want to do a table or chair because that to me is to glaring. Plus the mother and sister of my friend will be there and I do not want them upset, it is already hard enough losing her so young. I also do not want to be reminded anymore then I already am of my dad not being there!

(just like this picture.)

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This is what I was talking about. I love this idea.

Especially when its a father, because he is in essence, walking with you down the aisle.

We're reserving a bench and placing picture frames with their pictures, some flowers, and decorating a bench with ribbon to honor our (mostly mine...) deceased friends and family. similar to the picture. our venue has a little garden which is where we're having the ceremony, and there are a few benches pre-placed that are stone. there's one to the side that is clearly visible from the guests' and our perspective, so we figured it was a great place to put it. something like the picture, but with a single flower per person instead of the wreaths, and on the bench not chairs. maybe you can set something like this up? there are many options and inspo pics online. i found this one on pinterest i believe

I'm sure whatever you decide will be right. Follow your heart.

I plan on honoring my deceased friend by having a purple butterfly on my bouquet.

At my first wedding I used pictures of family members that had passed as decorations on the mantle and window ledges. They were there but it was discreet too. The guests were all family members and enjoyed seeing the photos.

For this wedding I'm thinking of using owls and pigs somewhere to honor his mother and my father. Owls were his mom's favorite and my dad collected pigs. I don't want it to be an obvious honoring for fear of upsetting his family members because his mom's passing is so recent.

I'm also considering have a lit candle somewhere to honor them instead. Im undecided about what to do.

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Agree with OGK!

I'm so sorry for your loss. Like other posters above, I would suggest a charm on your bouquet to have him with you on your special day.

The empty chair can be very upsetting. I'm actually of the opinion that any kind of display of deceased loved ones can be very upsetting (I'm not talking about your display of wedding pictures of all your grandparents and parents; that sounds beautiful). It draws everyone's focus to the loss, and you can't control or predict how others will react to seeing it. Some people might have a very strong, emotional reaction seeing a memorial display because the reminder focusing on what has been lost draws them right back into their grief.

I would think of small touches that can honor your friend, or things that will celebrate life (not focused on loss). The bouquet charm us a great idea. So is pinning something of your friends to the inside if your dress, wrapping your bouquet with a special tie or handkerchief, borrowing a piece of jewelry, using your friend's favorite flowers or colors in your bouquet or decor.

My grandmother passed away a few days before our wedding. I would have loved to have done a bouquet charm, but there was no time. I did not consider any kind if memorial display, as I felt it would be too hard for my family and I to see her picture that day or see a chair that was supposed to have been hers. I found a jazz version of one of the songs she used to hum and sing everywhere she went, and I asked our DJ to dedicate it to her. I wanted us to dance to celebrate her life because it was an activity she loved. Our DJ simply said it was for her because she couldn't be there that night and he asked everyone to get on the dance floor. We weren't focusing on our loss in that moment. We we're thinking about her life and how amazing it was, and we were up dancing and enjoying life. Perhaps if your friend had a favorite song (nothing sad), it would be appropriate to have it played during your reception.

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Sorry for your loss OP and other people in this thread. I quoted this because I also wanted to suggest maybe playing a song that the two of you both liked, or that has some special or happy memory tied to it.

@BlueHenBride that sounds like a wonderful tribute to your grandmother. Sorry for your loss.

FH will have lost his mother about 2 years before our wedding date. We're still trying to figure out ways to honor her and some other deceased loved ones too.