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Savvy April 2020

How to handle that person who posts all photos to social media

Kat19, on September 2, 2019 at 11:29 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 7

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Hi! So I have this family member that notoriously overshares photos on social media. If she goes to an event - a wedding, bday party, concert, the grocery store, the bathroom - you best believe there will be 100+ photos posted the next day on her social media showcasing her adventures. It's obnoxious and at this point, I just ignore them. Love the girl, but dang - discretion is NOT a concern for her.

For example, we both went to a wedding a couple of weekends ago (but not the same wedding). I took at least 50 pics of my FH and I, me and my friend (the bride), the decor, etc. and posted only 2 to instagram (a whole two weeks later). My family member posted an entire album (200+ pics and videos) the very next day after the wedding. If that wasn't enough, she posted those same 200+ photos to Instagram, which if you know IG, that's not how it works! What's worse, she saved and shared the couple's wedding highlight video and posted it to her own social media channels with the caption "This is so cute, I just had to share!!!" (and it was originally shared on the bride's private social media)!! I also remember a couple of years ago when she saved her friends PROFESSIONAL wedding photos and reposted an album to her own page. I was horrified for her friend. Just horrified.

I honestly fear what she will do at my wedding - and it also gives my FH anxiety, as we are both private people who have had the same profile photo on FB for 3+ years and very rarely post photos to any of our social media channels. We would love for guests to use our hashtag and post away....but like a few photos, not an entire album. Should we say something to guests (not directly to my family member) to imply we'd love to see their photos, but to please not go crazy and post an entire album? If I have lots of photos to share with someone, I would ideally post them to a private album that only a few people can view. How do I tell her this is the method I'd prefer? I know if I don't say anything, she will think it's completely okay to post a million photos. Help!

#PutTheCameraDownGirl

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7 Comments

Latest activity by Aleaj, on September 4, 2019 at 2:11 AM

Expert October 2019
Heather · on September 2, 2019 at 11:37 PM
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Honestly, I would speak with her directly. If you make a general statement, she may feel like it doesn’t apply to her because she’s family. I would just say that you’d like to keep your privacy and ask her not to post any photos that you haven’t posted yourself.
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Legend November 2019
Caytlyn · on September 2, 2019 at 11:42 PM
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I don’t think there’s any way to tell all of your guests that they can post a limited number of pictures without it sounding weird. I would just have a chat with this person. Are there certain things that you don’t want her to share? Giving her a number of photos she can share seems odd, but I think it’s well within your right to tell her you’d appreciate if you didn’t share the ceremony, first dance, whatever.
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Champion August 2017
Mrsbdg · on September 3, 2019 at 12:15 AM
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I think it depends on how close you are. If you are this uncomfortable and anxious around her, why invite her to celebrate with you at all?

I love posting in social media but clear large posts like that with friends and hosts ahead of time. If you don’t want her posting and your close I would talk to her personally.

Otherwise, you can’t control what your guests do or don’t post online. If she does post stuff from your wedding that you don’t like remove the tags or contact her to remove them.
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VIP September 2019
Mrs. Bubba · on September 3, 2019 at 10:29 AM
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Go ahead and tell her that you want her to leave her phone on the car or her Hotel Room if traveling.
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Super September 2019
Denise · on September 3, 2019 at 10:29 AM
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I have one of these too!!!! My aunt does this 100%! What we plan on doing is we're having a very small ceremony and she's simply not going to be there, but she's more than welcome to be at the reception! This was a main concern for FH and I when making the decision.
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VIP September 2019
Melissa · on September 3, 2019 at 12:42 PM
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I would speak to her about it, but maybe in a general setting with other family members present. Something along the lines of we really appreciate you taking all the pictures, but we would rather you not post a ton of our special day to your friends that we don’t know. My aunt is like this. Every picture and anyone’s personal business (like medical or things like that) gets posted on her Facebook. She had 3 albums of pictures from my shower posted before I even got home. She takes wonderful pictures but is overbearing sometimes so I’ve made it perfectly clear that they need to stay in their seats, out of the aisle and away from the professionals we have hired.
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Expert October 2019
Aleaj · on September 4, 2019 at 2:11 AM
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My aunt is the same way, i can only imagine what she’ll post of our wedding day. Lol just tell her to take it easy on posting pictures of your wedding day. I would also have her run which ones she posts by you first.
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