How to get around having so many kids at the wedding?

Hi B! Have you considered going "Adults Only" for your wedding? It might upset some people but it's an easy hard-and-fast rule you can apply equally.

Otherwise I'd consider paying for a babysitting service for all the kids - knowing that some parents might still choose to bring their you kids to the reception instead!

We're in the same situation as you are, in that for most of our guests this is going to be a destination wedding. We came up at 47 kids and just gave up... We considered hiring a babysitting service, but most parents decided that they would rather leave the kids with a grandparent for five days than leave them with an unvetted stranger at our wedding.. And I get that, our venue has open fires and would require the kids to be entertained in another building, out of sight of their parents. Thing is, we definitely do not need or want 40 unsupervised kids running around at our reception. So we've decided to go (almost) child free, after discussing the issue with the people we care about and want to attend. We would have paid for the babysitter, but there is obviously no need or want for that.

View Quoted Comment I have considered doing a cut off of kids 8 and up only, but I’m just worried because it is a “destination” wedding for them so I’m sure they’re gonna be stressed about finding someone to watch them for a whole weekend. Ugh just super stressful!!!

View Quoted Comment Ugh that is just wayyyy too much! I think we will consider doing a cut off for age 8 and up. But some of our cousins have 4 kids a piece so i just feel like they will be upset bringing some kids and not the others. It’s just such a headache. You can’t please everyone but the last thing I want to do is offend people!

View Quoted Comment I would need not do that (a cut), especially if you are splitting families... This will only offend people even more. You can't please everyone, so at least be consequent - either you invite people with children, or you don't.

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I wouldn't do a cutoff if it'll split families up. Our wedding is 18+ and while I would love to have 16+ so I can invite a couple of my cousins who I am closer to, it would break up out of state families on FH's side, so it's not happening. You're more likely to get pushback from parents who are able to bring one kid but not another than parents who can't bring any of their kids.

You can't really exclude some kids but not others. You could do adults only reception and/or ceremony with only the flower girl(s) and ring bearer(s) being invited