How far out should you ask your friends/family to be a member of your wedding party?

6-8 months beforehand. Relationships change. Soooo many people come on here saying they've been friends for 20plus years and nothing could ever change that and then BOOM! Something happens and now they're trying to get rid of someone from the BP. So be patient. Wait.

Exactly what Sass said. Also, some people choose their bridal party and ask them but then months later they decide that they want to add someone else to their bridal party. However, their stuck in a situation because since they asked the others so long ago it would make that person feel like an after thought.

I think it depends.

I asked mine immediately because I knew that they were great people and that I would love/adore them even if they were too busy to throw me a shower or do anything else but show up in a dress.

I agree with waiting to make sure nothing changes relationship wise! I will probably do a little over a year out, gives time to plan going away for a bachelorette party, shower, dresses etc. 6-8 months would make me too nervous!

Right after you set the date. They may have plans.

8 months out is a good time to ask. That gives plenty of time to find dresses and plan anything for you if they choose.

On a side note, if your groomsmen are renting attire, it can be just as expensive or more so than bridesmaids' dresses. Once you ask your wedding party to be in the wedding, make sure you (privately) talk to them about how much they can comfortably spend before making attire decisions.

I was so excited to pick my bridal party I chose way too soon and it blew up in my face, so definitely 6-8 months out. If it is a DW I'd say a year just so they have enough time to request time off, make arrangements and budget for it.

Seriously, Nancy? What if you set your date 3 years out?

Personally, I think around a year out is totally fine. In my experience as a bridesmaid, there can be a lot of costs between the dress, shoes, makeup/hair, pitching in for the shower and bachelorette party, etc., so I appreciate having extra time to save up and plan. Also, if you plan on ordering the bridesmaid dresses from a traditional bridal shop, they can sometimes take up 6 months to arrive, so you would have to mobilize everyone for dress shopping and purchasing super quickly if you wait that long to ask them.

We've set a date in October 2018 and I have asked all my bridesmaids. They are all family and I knew with most having kids or being in college they needed time to save up for everything. If you are asking I'd still ask them. I recently was in a wedding this past November and when I was asked we had less than a year to go. We immediately went shopping for bridesmaid dresses and there a sat trying to pay for a $260 dress after buying a house. I say do whatever you want since it is your wedding.

@snowangel @AMC18 Thank you for the input! I agree, the last wedding I was in I was notified about 16 months out and being a college student it was hard. Thankfully, all of my bridesmaids have careers, but being <5 out of college I want to give everyone a good heads up!

I have an UO. I asked mine a year and a half out. I have known all 8 longer than my fiancé and our relationships have always been drama free. I guess if some of your BP are people you have only known for a couple years maybe you should wait but if this is family or people you have been friends with long enough that they are practically family I do not see the need to wait.

I would say get your budget and venue set first, and then ask after those two major things are taken care of.

Honestly I don't think 6 months is enough time unless you let them pick their own dresses or order them from a fast shipping designer. Some designers can take anywhere from 3-5 months for a dress to come in. That doesn't leave a lot of time for picking a dress, ordering it, and getting alterations done. I think 8 months is reasonable to be able to pick the bridal party and give everyone enough time to find, order, and get alterations done on their dress.

My friend asked me two years prior and IM really glad she did--otherwise I would not be able to afford it. However, if the cost is so expensive that you think people might need more than a year to afford YOUR wedding (situation I'm in now), you may be asking too much of them financially and they may be embarrassed or love you too much to tell you. So I say bottom line, 6-8 months out and be thoughtful about what you ask of your women so that they will have NO trouble affording to participate in your day on that timeline.

I got engaged in August. My wedding will be October 2017. I asked my bridal party in November. My FH hasn't decided on his yet.

We have our wedding party already but we asked before I realized there was a timeframe to ask but I'm confident everything will be okay. However, I would follow everyone else's advice about waiting until at least 8 months out.

TRUST ME. I asked my 3 best friends at the time a month after I got engaged (November 2014) and ALL of them moved away like the next summer, I almost never talk to 2 of the 3 of them anymore. Honestly, if I had waited I would've asked maybe only one of them. Wait at least 6-8 months out.

I am asking mine a year out.

I asked before we set the date, but DF and I were originally planning on a December wedding and I wanted to make sure that wasn't a horrible time for anyone. But I've known for a long time who I've wanted to ask and know they'll all be fine. I'd be super surprised if anything major happened with them between now and the wedding. Just depends on the people and your relationship/how you treat them throughout the process.