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Super February 2024

How early is too early to request an RSVP?

Kd, on June 23, 2015 at 11:54 AM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 5

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We are having a small dinner party wedding at a winery. We have our invite list to 80 (which is the venue max). It seats "65 comfortably". Basically, the sooner we know the attendees, the better we can plan to add things to the room, i.e. ceremony space, musician space, little dance space, table for appetizers, etc.

Lots of out of towners (3-5 hour drive) will be invited. Basically I'd like to know asap so it is most comfortable and enjoyable for all, but I don't want to pressure anyone either.

Thanks!!

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5 Comments

Latest activity by Kd, on June 23, 2015 at 12:14 PM

Master November 2015
Rebecca · on June 23, 2015 at 11:56 AM
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It really shouldn't be more than 4 weeks before the wedding. Most of those things you can plan without knowing a completely exact number. Has your venue given you the date that they need final numbers by?

My wedding is the weekend before yours and our reply-by date is Oct. 30th.
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Master October 2015
VWCat · on June 23, 2015 at 12:01 PM
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Ours is 6 weeks out (August 31st) because I needed final numbers 4 weeks out to make final payments (a lot is determined by number of people), and you want to give yourself enough time to track down missing RSVPs.

My suggestion is to look over when final payments/head counts are due for your vendors, and give yourself a cushion of a week or two. You should not be asking for RSVPs next month if that's your question lol.
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Master June 2015
Mrs. Kassy · on June 23, 2015 at 12:08 PM
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Our RSVP date was 4 weeks before the wedding. Any more than 6 weeks out is ridiculous, in my opinion.
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Master October 2016
Sarah195 · on June 23, 2015 at 12:10 PM
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Sorry but people won't know what they are doing that far in advance. Things come up so you can't request an RSVP until at least 6 weeks out.
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Super February 2024
Kd · on June 23, 2015 at 12:14 PM
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Thanks! I'll shoot for 4 weeks out. I think I'll send the invites a little early and hope folks get back, voluntarily, soon. Luckily, it's a small group of family and friends whom we are in touch with often. One or two less tables could make a big difference! If I get a few declines early I'll be in business
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