How do you make a budget when you have no money?

I'm not being "mean" or beating you down. This is the cold, hard truth.

I never said you were being mean, your opinion is heard and and appreciated. I came here for advice and I'm receiving it. Are my little fantasies getting a slap to the face? Yeah, but that's also why I'm here, to be slapped in the face to some extent.

It's all good!

I think you may want to wait until you have some saving before you plan a wedding. Even though you can make payments some services require deposits from $50-$2000

Oh yeah I'm just trying to get an idea together, I know this isn't going to go down for a while. We're looking at venues online to see what we like for the future, we're not nearly in a position to start making deposits and the like. I haven't even told my parents yet because that is a nightmare I'm not excited to watch unfold. I enjoy planning things so I'm in like, a "pre-plan" stage I suppose? One of my favorite things is to get miles ahead of myself, but it also makes me happy so my partner and I will continue to gush and dream.

Definitely on team no loan. At the end of the day, your financial well-being is a lot more important than a party.

I'm also on team "second-job." DH and I both have pretty good paying jobs and we both decided to take on second jobs to make our dream wedding happen. Shockingly, we actually both STILL work two jobs, because we're young enough and we can. We have a lot of other financial goals we want to reach and an extra 10-20k a year with side work makes a big difference in quality of life. Can you bartend? Serve? Drive for Uber? Check out at Aldi? There are sooo many options to bring in some extra money if you're willing and able!

Definitely don't go into debt for a wedding. Your date is far enough out to start saving money! You might not have the "dream" big wedding, but something small and intimate can be on the cheaper if you do it right. There are a lot of wedding mock up budgets online! Look at those to get a good idea

@Chris you have a phenomenal attitude. Plan out your savings, build out a little contingency savings, and you'll get there when the time is right for what you two want

Kristin H thank you! I already have a much better idea about what I'm doing from everyone's responses. My car will be paid off in July 2018, so if I just stuff what used to be my car payments into savings I'll have a decent budget in no time. I also already have a regular credit card I can use to curb some of the smaller expenses when the time comes. (Not max out a card for anything, I'm very safe with my cards) In the meantime I'll also pray my FH gets a job that pays more than 9 friggen dollars and hour.

What my FH and I did was we sat down and went over exactly how much money we could save from that point to the wedding, we also made sure we had an emergency savings account in case something happened). As you start planning, you will realize that you see all these random expenses that you never thought about (my venue is making us pay for electric and water for the day). Please plan accordingly, the last thing you want to do as you start you marriage is to be in a large amount of debt because you wanted a bigger wedding. In the long term, it wont be worth it.

You need to save money. This may sound simple but it's little things that add up, going out to eat, movies, fast food and drinks, unnecessary things, etc. Set an amount out of your budget that you will save every month and not touch, you'll be surprised how fast it adds up. Good luck to you hun. It is possible but you'll have to make it happen and work hard.

Figure out how much you can save per month and times that by how many months you will have in your engagement. If you want more money then cut back more in places or get a second job.

Read The Total Money Makeover by Dave Ramsey. I don't totally agree with everything he says/does, but it sounds like even just some of the ideas presented in the book could help you. Good luck!

If you're 26 and 29 and have no real savings, I probably wouldn't be having a wedding at all. Why not elope?

This might be a pain in the neck, but it sounds like you guys have a hard time saving. I would open a savings account in a different bank than your checking account. Make yourself a payment every paycheck and deposit it in the savings account. If its with a different bank its not quite as easy to just log on to their app and transfer the money back into checking. And then don't touch the account.

It also sounds like you have never saved much. So don't set your ambitions too high with the monthly amount. If you do, you'll be more likely to end up shorting yourself at the end of the month and withdrawing money. Start small. Once you've deposited that amount for a few paychecks, if you're meeting all obligations, up the amount.

But you really do need savings for other things as well...so I would advise not using every dime you save between now and then on the wedding.

I just wanted to add to something, you mentioned that your parents won't be giving you financial support towards your wedding, but that your mom will be upset if you don't invite her side of the family... to this I would say, if she isn't paying then she can't dictate who you should invite. It is a nice courtesy to ask your parents who they would like to have there, but weddings are expensive and at the end of the day, it should be about who YOU want there. If she was paying, it would be a different story.

Don't get forced into a larger wedding than you can afford.

One of the first things I did was cut my guest list by 20 people.

I have a savings account at a credit union that I don't really have access to (no bank card for it and the bank itself is in the city I used to live in). I have part of my paycheck direct deposited into it every two weeks. It's only $50 a paycheck, so I don't miss it, but it's definitely adding up. That's my emergency fund and then everything else I save on top of that is for the wedding. Check with your bank. Most allow you to set up different savings accounts for different goals and credit unions can help you figure out how to save.

I also recommend looking into the envelope method for budgeting. You figure out how much you'll need to spend each month, and use cash in envelopes to make sure you don't overspend. It really works!

There is a lot of good advice here, and it sounds like you're taking it to heart.

Don't ever take a loan out for a party

Be prepared to be flexible about not what you CAN spend on a party, but what you SHOULD spend on a party.

Don't feel guilty for not inviting people that your families think "must" be there.

Pay yourself first, even if it's a little bit. Investigate sites like Smartypig.com and Digit.co (Digit.co takes little amounts from your checking account based on your activity. I hardly even notice it honestly and in a year and a half my account is at almost 4000.)

Save all your change; save all your five dollar bills.

Work on an emergency fund and yes, retirement first. Retirement money is much more powerful when it's been working a long time.

Resist the wedding industry and Pinterest's concepts of 'the perfect wedding'. Most of it is calculated to make you spend more or feel guilty and deprived, whether you spend it ten bucks at a time ("oh what cute napkins!") or thousands ("it's our dream venue but it's over budget")

Separate the 'wedding' from the 'marriage'. They are totally unrelated.

Imagine a different scenario; parents, siblings, dress, tux, bouquet, 10 guests, restaurant.

Don't put your marriage on hold because you can have a party for three years. That's like not buying a new shirt until you lose weight. Life is now, and while many people say that nothing changes when you're married, I can tell you that it does. It's not 'just a piece of paper'.

As for life itself???? Develope good, frugal habit that will serve you not only for the wedding but beyond.

Cut cable. Switch to your local channels only plus hulu, roku, amazon, netflix. How much reality TV and wrestling can you watch anyway?

Revisit your phone and data plans. Do you need to stream movies in your car? Resist the urge to replace your devices whenever you can. Buy a case for your phone so you don't have to replace it.

If you lease cars, look at buying used ones. Leasing is very rarely a better deal unless you drive a billion miles a year.

Stop eating out at random. Learn to cook if you don't know how. Don't buy coffee every morning; it goes from being a treat to being a line item.

Don't recreationally shop. Find good thrift and overstock stores near you. There are several chains that are fantastic; Unique, Value Village, American Thrift Stores, Red White and Blue are all great.

Get a library card and use it; for books, movies, music.

Investigate free date ideas; national parks, community events, volunteering

Investigate part time jobs and mystery shopping (www.volition.com is a great gateway site for legit mystery shopping companies. Bonus? Free oil changes, free meals; one of my companies was offering free dental exams if you write about them.

Join your local Freecycle group. I run the one in Bergen County NJ, and we've had people donate everything from hot tubs to bowling balls to baby clothes to taxidermy supplies.

Don't buy any item of clothing that doesn't go with the things you own already.

The great thing about saving is that it really does feel better than spending; it's weird. I've been an entrepreneur for almost 30 years, with some good years and some really shitty ones. For me, this way of life isn't the price of a wedding,it's the price of my freedom, but it's oddly compelling.

Good luck!

I woke up to more awesome advice, thank you everyone!

I want to clarify my finances to everyone a little bit, because I do feel like I'm giving off the slightly wrong impression. The title really should have been "How do you figure out a budget when you have significantly less financial security and knowledge than a decent amount of people your age, and continuously get hit with expenses just as the savings begin to accumulate" however that would have been long winded. FH and I do basically live paycheck to paycheck, however through hard work we've gotten to the point were we don't roll $0 in out bank account at the end of every month, and the number steadily grows. We did have a good $2500 saved in a few short months, however recently a large amount of that was drained for just larger expenses. Some car repairs, veterinary bills, and I wiped out and cancelled one of my credit cards.

We already ditched cable, we do home cook very often, and the most extravagant summer "vacation" we do is visit a local Amusement Park, which I pay for my separating my tips from work. My largest expense besides rent is my car, which I bought last year and is 12 years old. I chose an older car specifically to pay it off quickly. (One of my uncles I semi want to invite actually provided me the loan, so I'd like to invite him to the wedding to show my gratitude.) My animals, of which I have 3 and are all special needs are also covered by pet insurance.

Another major hurdle that has kept us from saving as much as we like in general is my FH was laid off last year for a few months, and while he does have a new job he dropped from $12.50 an hour to only $9.

As far as my parents go, I'm sure if I asked they would provide some help. Not a lot mind you I'm basically more well off than they are at this point. However, I refuse the help, only because it would cease to be my wedding and become my mother's wedding 2.0. That's a whole story that will take way too long to get in to, but my mother would absolutely try to shoehorn me out of every one of my ideas. I'm not into that at all, and my mother and I duke it out over everything already.

I hope this helps give a better idea of my financial health, I fear I gave everyone a picture of the two kids in the shoebox apartment with one bowl and a pack of ramen noodles between them.

@Olivia, you can't just get a job bartending, they're competitive. OP, if you don't even have a savings now, I'd let go of the idea of a modern wedding right now. There are many ways to save money, but to you won't find them here. WW is the land of proper hosting, and that equates to spending a fortune on food and booze. Have a tiny wedding, elope, do a cake and punch reception. The traditional American wedding has been held at home in the family parlor until the early twentieth century. If you have a family member with a beautiful house, have an intimate wedding there, and you'll be following in the footsteps of our grandmothers. Whatever you do, don't go into debt for your wedding. Have the wedding you can afford, and trust that that is the perfect wedding for you. Good luck!

@Unawarepandabear I need to go ahead and give you a nerd shoutout, Wind Waker all day.

I'm actually thinking until my car is payed off to separate my work tips. It will be a slow money snowball, but a snowball none the less. Depending on the week I can make $100 in tips or $0 in tips. I'm a groomers' assistant, so I'm tipped based on what dogs we have scheduled and if the client realizes yes, you really should tip your groomer. I already have plans for a small birthday celebrating for FH with my current tips, but realistically in a few months I may be able to have a few hundred dollars to start.