How do i tell bride I’ll be 5 months pregnant at her wedding?

I’d just share your happy news with your friend. You have every right to be excited and happy about it, and you don’t need to schedule your family planning around someone’s wedding (or their “strong opinions”!). If the bride mentions concerns, be accommodating and make suggestions, but you have no need to apologize or resign. Five months is not going to prevent you from participating in the wedding, which is the only reason you’d need to voluntarily resign IMO. If she feels that strongly about it, she can ask you to step down.

"she has strong feelings against people getting pregnant at this age. Should I offer to opt out of being a bridesmaid if it makes her uncomfortable?"

These statements make me uncomfortable for you. If this is news you are ready to share and are happy, there should be 0 reason why you friend can't be happy for you and still have you as a bridesmaid. If all she shows you is "judgment" and "uncomfortableness" she is not your friend and not someone you want around you during your pregnancy.

View Quoted Comment Agreed. If she is anything other than happy for you, she is not a good friend! I wouldn't step down yet. Share your happy news whenever you feel comfortable, the way you normally would. If she asks you to step down over it, that's her problem.

Well first and foremost, CONGRATULATIONS!!! I’ve actually just had something like this happen. My most long-term friend reached out to me very nervously because she just found out she was pregnant and will be 8 months at the time of my wedding. She lives out of state and politely backed out stating she still wanted to attend if it’s safe for her to travel at that time. Personally, I felt nothing but joy and excitement for my friend but I know she was so nervous to bring it up. So my advice is to think about how you would feel on the day of. Are you going to be uncomfortable standing on your feet all day? Yes, this is her day. However, you’re her friend and she should want you to be comfortable. Hope this helps and that your friend is understanding. I’m so happy for you!

If you are close enough to be a bridesmaid, you should be close enough to not be afraid to tell her as soon as you are ready. If she was an in law you have no relationship with or a random acquaintance, then yes it would harder. But a best friend theoretically should be able to have the conversation being happy for your milestone and not judging you. However the red flag is her personal bias against pregnancy. She can’t stop nature from happening no matter how hard she wishes it. If she doesn’t understand, then she’s not a friend and you don’t need that type of negativity. Always be honest. Even white lies and omissions never serve anyone because it’s not courteous and you have to work to keep stories straight, which is why honesty is always the best policy. The sooner you get the conversation taken care of, the sooner it will be off your chest. Countless pregnant bridesmaids do exist without issues. Unless there are medical complications, you don’t need to step down for that reason.

You need to tell her. You can start off by saying you have news for her and you want her to be happy hearing it. You can tell her you understand if she wants to adjust her plans any -- or to keep the bridesmaids plans she already has. Whatever comes of that just realize the great things ahead and make the best of everything.

You just tell her. I don't know if you are older or younger than a typical first time mom, but even if she has her reasons to be concerned, it has nothing to do with your role in her wedding and she will need to keep her feelings to herself. She would be out of line to ask or expect you to step down. Obviously you shouldn't offer.

I don't understand how you know you are "6th in the lineup" or why there would be any sort of "ranking" in the first place if that's what it really is. That would be so distasteful.

View Quoted Comment 6th probably refers to the order she'll be walking down the aisle.

View Quoted Comment I figured, but unless OP thinks there is some deeper meaning or priority to that position, why mention it?

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I'm assuming she means that if she drops out then the other bridesmaids order won't be effected.

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Is that something that couldn't very easily be worked out even up to the day of if need be? Asking seriously.

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Of course it can! It's not OP's wedding though and I'm sure they don't want to cause any stress to the bride. They might not know it's an easy fix