How Do I Deal With This Pushy Friend?

Oh that's a tough one... personally I would have fh talk to his friend about it. Maybe he can can nudge her into her place... I may not have the best advice tough. I hate confrontation lol

I am scared as heck that M is going to show up at the hotel, and pretend like she is one of the bridesmaids, and interfere with the photography (she is an amateur photographer). What do I say to her to shut her down? She just has the constant need to be involved and this is exactly why I didn't make her in the wedding party. I just can't believe she suggested T get ready with her when T is a bridesmaid. Like what the heck????

Brianna, thanks, I hate confrontation too, and so does my FH. He always needs to see the best in people and sometimes he just can't see that people are doing things that are wrong. But I told him that T is getting ready with me and that M is not to determine that. He's like "Whatever you want babes."

If she keeps it up, she may need a dose of tough love. She honestly might think she is helping and not realize how pushy she is being.

Are T and M close? Brief T on the situation and tell her you don't want M getting ready with you guys. Don't give exact details on the location your bridal party is getting ready to M and hopefully she won't try to crash.

I think what you said was good... hopefully it keeps her in place.

Yeah, I told M that I'd paid for T's makeup as she is driving from far away to be here, and I think M understood. But I seriously hope she doesn't crash the party. She has her own hair/makeup girl coming to her house, so hopefully she will just stay away. I remember M's wedding day. I didn't text her or call her at all and her wedding was at 4pm and that's the first time I saw her all day. I gave her her space. She needs to do the same for me. She can't keep thinking she is a bridesmaid when she is not. Her constant need to know what is going on and to be in the loop is very frustrating. I think if we keep the "getting ready location" a secret, maybe she won't try to crash. And Ill give T a heads-up and say, "this is where I need you, at this time."

I feel like M is trying to be friendly to you (maybe she's trying to be helpful) and you just keep shooting her down.

I'm honestly not trying to shoot her down, I swear. I know she is trying to be helpful, but I just have a specific idea of how I want the day to play out. It doesn't make sense for T not to get ready with me and the other bridesmaids since she is one of the bridesmaids herself, right?

No it doesn't make sense, but maybe her wedding wasn't planned out like yours. You've already called her pushy and suggested that she's manipulative. Using only what you've provided us with, I feel like this is an episode of mean girls or something. That is only going off of what you've told us of course. I have no additional background to go off of.

She is my friend and I know her well. I know that she enjoys being in control, and that she likes attention. She has always been that way, and no it's not always a bad thing, but when it's someone else's wedding day and you are not in the wedding party, sure you can offer suggestions but the bride or groom do not have to use them if they don't want to. I don't mind suggestions or advice. I have used some of the suggestions she has given me.

And I said she is acting pushy in my opinion, and that I'm afraid she is going to be manipulative. I did not say that she is outright manipulative, and I'm sorry if I'm coming across as mean but I know what she is like, I have known her for 5+ years.

Yeah I agree with you that maybe her wedding wasn't planned like mine, but I wouldn't know because I wasn't in her bridal party lol

I stand by what I said.

To each their own.